Pokemon: The First Movie Recap Rap

[Verse 1]
Trek through a forest far away
Looking for a fossil for its DNA
To make a clone of the most powerful Pokémon
Even more powerful
What could possibly go wrong?
With a mouthless, tall, three-fingered cat
That's Psychic
Ohhh, He can blow up labs...
But he wants to know
"What's my purpose, Who am I though?"
So deep and wise
Though he sounds a little high, bro

Meanwhile, Ash and crew, picnic free of hassle
Then Ash has to battle a bandana-wearing asshole
News from a castle, a Dragonite satchel
An invitation for...wait for it...
More Battles!!!
A Star Wars hologram
Oh, It's Nurse Joy
Team Rocket gonna crash the party too
Oh boy...
Try to take a ferry but storm makes 'em cancel
That Mewtwo made with his weird-shaped hand-swirl

"Hey, ride with us! We're definitely Swedish"
"Not Team Rocket, Just definitely Swedish"
Storm keeps a-rag'n, Drowning as the waves hit
Are they gonna make it?
(Stay tuned!)

[Chorus 1]
Pokémon
Gotta catch 'em all
Began on TV
Created their first movie
In their quest to make money!
Po-ké-mon!

[Verse 2]
Look, they're alive!
Leave the water, then get dry quick
Greeted by Nurse Joy, but she tries to deny it
Wait, what the heck, she's possessed?
Holy Crap
She loses her hat!
Nurse Joy!
How about that?

Meanwhile, Team Rocket bumbles along
Accidentally makes a clone
Who's that Pokémon?
Sees a film that explains how Mewtwo came along
"Sounds like a real Pokénstein!"
Facepalm

Mewtwo has a plan for you boys and girls
With his army full of clones, he will rule the world
Starting with the extinction of the human race
Followed by their Pokémon 'cause they're slaves, disgraced

But one small thing, if I could be critical
How's he gonna make the clones without the originals?

I digress
Mewtwo throws some Pokéballs
He catches a few but he-

Sorry, I'm not done with this
He's only got a few clones, what happens next?
If they can't produce more, do they need to have sex?
And if clones from the same lab bang, is it incest?
Someone let me know, I'm losing sleep over this!!

[Chorus 2]
Pokémon
Gotta catch 'em all
You're overthinking
[Am I?]
You know this was made for kids!
[I guess]
Just take it for what it is:
[Okay...]
Po-ké-mon!!!!! [Thanks Chorus lady, I'll take it from here!]

[Verse 3]
H'okay, back
Here we go
The original task:
And now Ash has all his Pokémon back
Such a brave little boy standing up to Mewtwo
But why try to punch him?
Why on Earth would that work, dude?
Pokémon fight all their correlating clones
And everyone cries as the punches are thrown
It's a war out there, it's emotional, it's hard
Best underscored by an acoustic guitar

{Brother, my brother...}

Ash comes to realize, only he can stop the fight
Runs between electric lights, as a human sacrifice

Pika cries famous tears, hearts full of dread
(A Pokémon's magic tears resurrect the dead!)
Mewtwo shows empathy, now he's not the enemy
"I will remember this, but I should wipe your memories."

Wake up at the docks, hey isn't that funny?
They all have amnesia, but they're really just hungry
Well, off they go, to continue adventuring
No one gives a shit that they don't remember anything!!!

[Chorus 1]
Pokémon
Gotta catch 'em all
Began on TV
Created their first movie
In their quest to make money!
Po-ké-mon!
Gotta catch 'em all!