Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame Recap Rap

[Verse 1]
Ragnarok had a hopeful close
Forget that, now those bros are toast
Scrap the baddie from Avengers: One
'Cause Lavender Zaddy's on a scavenger hunt

Banner comes to beneath the stairs
There's a battle in robes and athleisure-wear
Magic and nanotech, Spidey comes swinging-in
Then they go to space and the Hulk stays impotent

Cut to Bettany and Olsen in Scotland
Cronies interrupt, Steve's beard stops 'em
Steve's beard: so full and clean
Those beautiful bristles own every scene

Thor's in on the Guardian experience
Stays 20/20
Sees giant Tyrion
Make an axe with the help of fever dream team
Star CrossFit and the arm of a tree teen

Gamora can't give her dad the slip
Thwarted by the power of an acid trip
Red Skull Sherpa's a bond in the worst way
Crappy end to take-your-daughter-to-work day

Now Strange is feelin' the vibes
Odds are one in 14,000,605
Gangin' upon Thanos, everybody hold on
Almost got it, but Quill is a moron

Wakanda opens up, CGI war
Bucky-Rocket, double Scarlet
Stormbreakin' Thor
Vision's mind wrecked to complete the set
Then an axe to the chest
"You should've gone for the head."

Oh, snap!
I mean, he said he would
"Mr Stark, I don't feel so good..."
Fury sends a page right before he kicks the bucket
Thanos is pooped, but boy, was he productive

[Hook 1]
Avengers assembled
And holy crap, that got real dark!

[Verse 2]
Say hello and goodbye to the Bartons
Neb and Tony saved by Deus ex Larson
Thanos has me-time before the Avenging
Go for the head
Now he's dead!
What an ending!

JK! Now it's been five years
They've lost so much, including Steve's beard (Why?!)
A rat hits a button, Scotty's in the fray
On his Paul Rudd game, ain't aged a day

It's a heist, round up a squad
Thor's rocking divorced uncle bod (hello)
Hawkeye's ragin' in the Tokyo nightlife
Hulk wears sweaters, Scar Jo has highlights

But Tony's settled down for once
'Til he sees a photo of his surrogate son
He does a science and joins the plan
Flashback time and you're welcome, fans

2012 NYC, fight familiar enemies
Bit of Steve-on-Steve, then it's back to the '70s
Uncanny Pym, age-accurate Carter
Tony offers fatherly advice to his father

Emotional judo for the powerless people
R.I.P Black Widow
Guess we'll see you in the prequel
Oh, and Neb's been a CCTV
Hulk Snap!
BOOM!
Thanos wanna repeat

Beefcake battles, flying fists of fury
Mjolnir rattles
Yo, Cap is worthy!
Orange circles forming, getting sentimental
"Avengers!"
Here it comes!
"Assemble."

Tables turn quick, down go flying machines
Ladies in the mix, here we go!
Yas queens!
Gauntlet rugby, here's the one and only chance
"I am inevitable."
"I am Iron Man."

[Hook 2]
Avengers assembled
And wiped the floor with Avatar!

[Verse 3]
Send Tony's heart out adrift on the lake
No one RSVP'd ''No'' to the wake
Breaking new ground and universe founding
"Love you 3000"? That and counting
Cap takes the stones back, ever so dutiful
Gave life a chance
And why not? It's so beautiful
Locked in his legacy
Oh, but beyond that
Evans better have "full beard" in his contracts!