Me and Saddam

Boy, I tell you, politics does make for strange bedfellows. That’s true, man. I read a quote in the paper two days after the election from Saddam Hussein, and ah he said – oh, they had to wait two days to get a quote from him, you know. They had to wait for him to quit gut-laughing... some bunker in Baghdad, you know: ‘Aaah-ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Haah! The elephant is dead.’ Saddam Hussein says in this quote, ‘We have nothing against America. We just want to see George Bush beheaded and his head kicked down the road like a soccer ball.’ And I was thinking, that’s so weird, ‘cause... that’s what I wanted to see. Wow, me and Hussein, we’re like this. Who woulda thunk it?

‘He’s a Hitler.’ You know, they find out, you know, Bush has been selling weapons to Iraq since whenever, and we knew that – I knew that, during the Persian Gulf War those intelligence reports would come in:

‘Iraq – incredible weapons, incredible... weapons.’
‘How do y’all know that?'
‘Well . . . we looked at the receipt. But as soon as that cheque clears, we’re goin’ in. What time’s the bank open? Eight? We’re goin’ in at nine... for God and country, and he’s a Hitler, and hey, look, a foetus, so whatever you need, let’s go! Whatever you, the apathetic, docile masses, need to get behind– here, here’s a foetus. Come on!’
‘Ah, it’s a little foetus, look. It’s a little foetus. I hate this man all of a sudden. He’s a Hit— he’s holdin’ a little foetus.’

I tell you one thing: I’m glad fuckin’ Bush lost to get rid of those pro-life fucks off my TV! That little foetus got more TV time than I did last year, goddamn it! I don’t know who that little foetus’ agent is, but goddamn it, that little foet– he was on more TV than me! He had some agent.

‘You’re gonna be big one day, kid. You’re gonna be huge. I’m gonna have you swimmin’ in pools of formaldehyde, kid. You’re gonna be a big foetus, oh yeah. I’m gonna have you the wacky next-door-neighbour foetus, kid. You’re gonna be huge. Move out to LA, kid. I’ll introduce you to some of Drew Barrymore’s children.’

Yes, come on. Let it out! Let it out! LET IT OUT!