Prose & Poetry

Here's a piece of poetry—it isn't exactly poetry, it's more prose
I kissed her lips, and then just for meanness
She twisted her legs and broke my glasses
See, everything—everything don't have to rhyme, ya'mean
There's a few definitions—frustration—you've heard the word many times
A lot of you might not know what frustration is
Frustration is finding out for the first time that you can't do it the second time
And panic, which fits in that groove
Panic is finding out for the second time that you can't do it the first time
Ah, people must know, it's three guys got into a little small town with nowhere to sleep
Three guys said, "Look, we don't have anywhere to stay, we'll pay you well"
Farmer said, "Well. sure, I can put you up for the night, but you'll have to sleep in the barn with my daughter
And I don't want you to touch her, don't do nothing to her 'cause something bad'll happen to you
Something pretty bad around you in this territory, so go in there and sleep with her and leave her alone"
Farmer's daughter came out the barn, her clothes all torn off of her, her hair was messed up, and she had on one shoe
Farmer ran up, she said, "Daddy, they misused me, daddy"
And daddy got his double-barrel shotgun and ran in the barn, said, "I told you guys not to mess with my daughter"
He said, "Now line up over there"
These three guys lined up, he said, "Look, what's your occupation?"
First fella said, "I chop trees down," he said, "That's how I make my living"
Farmer took a hatchet and *whoo*—wow, no more sex for him
He asked the second guy, he said, "What you do?"
He said, "I'm a butcher, I work down about seven miles down, and I'm a butcher"
Got a cleaver out and *whoo*—no more sex for him
This third cat was sitting over in the corner laughing, he said, "Ha ha ha"
Farmer said, "You saw what I just did to these two guys, what you standing over there laughing for?"
He said, "Well, I work in a lollipop factory"—and you can tell each other
There's a guy that came in a nightclub—it was a bar, he had about 14 or 20 drinks, he got half-drunk
He said, "If the furniture don't get no better I'ma lose my ass"
Bartender, you know, he said, "Look buddy this is a respectable place, you don't use that language in here
We have ladies sitting around the bar and at the tables having a few cocktails, don't say that in here"
So a little while passed by, he had three or four more drinks
He said, "If the furniture business don't get no better I'ma lose my ass"
Bartender walked around, grabbed him and walked him outside
A chick jumped up from the bar, she said, "Why you puttin' him out? His business is almost like mine"
She said, "If the ass business don't get no better I'ma lose my furniture"
Might as well enjoy yourself, the Lord knows you in here drinking liquor
If the Lord's a Puerto Rican, all of us in trouble
There's a guy who worked in an office building, he came out the restroom, he had a key
He walked back into his office, and his secretary said, "Your front door is open"
He looked all around, hell, he know what she's talking about, "Your front door is open"
So he backed up, and she said, "Your front door is open"
So he said, "Oh, oh, oh"—he said, "When you saw it, did you see that there West Pointer standing at attention?"
She said, "Hell no, I saw a disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags"