Who’s Next?

Phew. Well, it’s the last show. Here we are. Los Angeles. The world capital of… rape and dick breath.

The fuck has been going on out here? Keeps getting worse. Just when you think it can’t get worse, they got Charlie Rose today.

It’s going to be a quiet morning on the news tomorrow. Charlie Rose. Who’s next? Captain Kangaroo?

Everybody is raping like hotcakes. I, for one, am starting to get worried. You know, I’ve been in show business 30 years. I had no idea how much danger I was in.

It’s really some scary shit. I gotta tell you. Harvey Weinstein‘s probably the first person that I ever looked at a photograph of and was like, “Yeah, he rapes.”

I’m not sure this motherfucker has a choice. Not a handsome man. A lot of meat and extra skin on his face. Yeah, he’s ugly. You know, the sad part is he’s done so well in life, he probably doesn’t know he’s ugly. You know, when you’re good-looking, everybody will tell you. “Oh, you look wonderful, you’re so great looking.” But when you’re ugly. You gotta figure that shit out for yourself.

It’s a lot of putting clues together, really is. “Why am I not getting in the club? I got all the right shit on.”

If it was Brad Pitt doing that shit, you wouldn’t have heard a peep. Girl would’ve just come back down like, “I got the part!"

Yuck! Good one.