I Was Right Once

yo. I don’t mean to be disrespectful, because I know you’re upset with what I said. But, you know, I know you’re– I know you’re right. But come on, baby, it’s me. I was right once, remember that?

Does anybody remember when I was missing from show business for 12 years? Remember when I had this really popular show and I quit? I remember I walked away from $50 million. A lot harder than walking away from Louis’ freckled dick.

I didn’t know that I’d ever work again. And yet, here I am tonight. Did my dream die? No.

I remember that shit. You don’t remember that, when I quit my shit? On the way out the door I said, “Something’s wrong in Hollywood.” I believe they said I smoked crack. That’s what I remember. I remember they called me crazy. So really, you know, you’re right, ladies. Congratulations. Enjoy it. And they’re coming for you, bitches.

They’re coming for you.

One person that’s uncomfortable– Know who’s the most uncomfortable motherfucker in the room? The nigga that’s right. I was right at an orgy once. Nobody fucked me.

I was just walking around like Tom Cruise at the movies, just looking. And ruined the whole orgy by accident. It’s easier to ruin an orgy than you think. All you gotta do is wait for it to get kind of quiet and then go, “Eww.”