The Soldiers by Redd Foxx
The Soldiers by Redd Foxx

The Soldiers

Redd Foxx * Track #7 On The Best of Foxx (Volume 1)

The Soldiers Lyrics

Say, it was two soldiers, and they were also in the service
One soldier was from Texas, the other one from California
This Californian—you know, people like to try to brag about their home, how great it is
And this California soldier, he had really told some tall tales about the West Coast
He said it was oranges so big in California, the juice dripped out
And if they didn't have buckets under the oranges
That it would cause floods all through the valley, orange juice floods
And the Texas soldier said, "I know what you mean 'cause we have some stuff in Texas make people that wouldn't even believe"
He said, "My uncle had a farm down in Texas, and he used to grow corn so big
I looked out the window one day and it was 18 crows sitting on one ear of corn eating as fast as they could and it last us for 20 minutes"
And these two soldiers, they got overseas, you know, and they got in the thick of battle, the soldier from California and this one from Texas
And they were laying in the foxhole and the enemy was getting closer, and they knew that this might be it
So the soldier from California looked at the Texas soldier and said, "Listen," he said, "I wanna straighten up my life before anything might happen"
He said, "I want you to know, remember I told you in camp about the oranges in California being so big the juice was dripping?"
He said, "I was lying," he said, "Wasn't no oranges that big"
And this Texas soldier said, "Well, I exaggerated a little bit myself"
He said, "You know how I said it was 18 crows on that ear of corn?"
He said, "It really wasn't but 17 because he 18th crow was standing on one foot"
I worked in Texas once and it was really in the woods
I closed my engagement, and started on my way back California
And I was running late on the way getting back to California
And I asked a Texan, I said, "What time it is? What is it?"
And he pulled out his watch and looked at the sun, and he looked at the watch and he said "10:35"
I said, "Is that sun time or railroad time?"
He said, "It don't make no difference 'cause one's just as further as the other one"
You know Valentine's is nearing, you know, when you got a mate that's really on the ball, you know, you get a present or something
Candy, a fella bring his wife some candy, or a wife bring her husband something nice
My wife surprised me, got me a Valentine's present, made my eyes pop out
It was a shirt three sizes too small
But you know how I told you about how my wife giving me a Valentine's present
But Christmas, she gave me a present, she gave me a nice gift, you know
And she wrote on it, "Do not open until New Year's"
See, she didn't wanna spoil my Christmas
You know, a lot of people talk about countries and who should be the ruler of the earth and all that kinda stuff
But in America, they talk about equality, but I don't see it
The rich people live good and the poor people suffer
But it's different in Russia—everybody suffers
A guy over on La Brea ran out of his cafe and asked the police to find his cashier
Police asked, "Was she tall or short?"
Cafe owner said, "Both"

The Soldiers Q&A

Who wrote The Soldiers's ?

The Soldiers was written by Redd Foxx.

Who produced The Soldiers's ?

The Soldiers was produced by Redd Foxx.

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