Tell Me If I Have a Booger On My Nose, Please

I need you to tell me
(If I have a booger on my nose)
I need you to inform me
(If I have a booger on my nose)
Won't you tell me all about it?
(If I have a b-b-b-b-booger on my nose)

There isn't any mirror, so if a booger should appear
I need you here, I need you near
When you see one, make it clear
Don't be subtle, on the double
You cannot allow me to go around with a face full of snot

You've got to tell me
(If I have a booger on my nose)
I need you to tell me
(If I have a booger on my nose)
Please tell me
(If I have a b-b-b-b-booger on my nose)

It's not at all impolite, it's not unkind or hostile
To inform a man of what is going on with his nostril
It's the right thing to do, oh, oh, oh, yes, that's true
And you can rest assured, I'll do the same for you

You've got to tell me all about it
(If I have a b-b-b-b-booger on my nose)