At The Wig Store

(La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la)

My friends are all on TV
But they don’t talk about me
Even when David Letterman says
To say hi
To the people
At home

But I suppose it’s okay
I go to work anyway
You see, I have to get paid
To get food
I can eat
When I’m sitting at home

On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la la la)
On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la)

I walk around the displays (I rearrange the faceless heads)
I have to dust the toupees (should rearrange myself instead)
I wish that I could explode
And be through
With this sorry
Excuse for a store (I wish I could explode)

Somebody answer the phone (is it for me, is it for me)
Why won’t they leave me alone? (what did they want, what did they say)
Aren’t there enough bells
In my head
As it is
Without them
Adding more? (why don’t they please just go away)

On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la la la)
What is the bell on the desk for?
Somebody wake me if I snore
On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la)

I’ve never seen so many balding people in one place
I know what all the people look like under their toupees

On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la la la)
I’m sweeping the hair from the showroom floor
Keeping an eye on the front door
On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la)

I see the light of youth is fleeing from his shifty eyes
I have to hide my laughter as I hand him his disguise

I think I’m wasting my time (I’ve had enough, I’m seeing red)
I think I’m losing my mind (a chorus line of severed heads)
I think I’m losing my grip
And I’ll flip
Out and quit
And go work
Somewhere else (I want to get back into bed)

On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la la la)
On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la la la)
I’m sweeping the hair from the back floor
Keeping an eye on the front door
Taking a break at the drug store
What is the bell on the desk for
Somebody wake me if I snore
On company time at the wig store (la la la la la la)