Worthless

Yeah I never meant to be this way
Always shutting down never reaching out with the words I need to say
I could use a friend right now
I just need someone to pick me up so I just don’t drown

Can’t rely on others i'm just let down
Just pretend it’s fine until I breakdown embrace hell
I feel like I’ve been here before
Never really winning just pushing on to the next day

Attending funerals where I can’t remember the names
Maybe ill see myself laid to rest here and then i'll fade away
Cus these thoughts don’t make sense to me never filled with energy
Anger seems to take control when I think of my families name

No matter how much I hate you I hate myself more
Just the fact that I can harbor this just breaks at the soul
So if you could tell me how to let go of this misery
Would you come, would you come and set me free

Im worthless, so pick me up, pick me up, pick me up, and then you say
It’s hurting, so what’s it now, what’s it now, issues seem to find me how
Im worthless so pick me up, pick me up, pick me up and light the match
Im burning, just to bring me down, bring me down, I open up my souls yours now

So what did I have to say
To make you hate me and turn things this way
My heart is like a river but it’s dried up
Burnt at both ends till the fire just consumes us

Yeah so how do I explain to a family that doesn’t understand
The sunlight passes through the shutters burn my irises again
Cus i'm introverted, not worth don’t wanna go outside
Mind is lurking on topics ill and say im fine

You can see pass through the fake smile
Yeah would you like to understand it even if it’s for a while
It’s like there are fishing hooks inside my skin
Yeah when everything is doing fine you reel me in

Searching through my pockets like what’s the point there’s no money there
Roll the last of my tobacco cus id rather breath it than the air
My gums are an astray why did I expect to stay
Walk into another home just to be kicked out again