Why I Am Normal

I would say I'm a normal everyday person
You know, I like, y'know, I like girls
I like to eat in restaurants, I like sports cars
I like motorcycles, I like to go to ball games
See the Dodgers, I used to be a Dodger fan

Dodgers are losing this year
But you can't all win every year, y'know?
I'd like to get married one day
Have kids, raise a normal family
Normal neighborhood, y'know, I guess—and work

Y'know, like, I'm a singer, like, y'know, do my thing as a singer, Y'know, I like to go to the Pink Pussycat once in a while
And watch some of the strippers strip, y'know, like every nasty Man that leaves their wife at home does once in a while, y'know?

Probably pays fifty to a hundred bucks to ball 'em
But I don't, y'know, I like, y'know, I like little kids
I like to sing to little kids, like when I go down to the beach and I sing, like I'm always singing songs for dimes
It's a way to make a living, y'know?

I have people say, y'know:
"Why don't you do something else—
Why don't you get yourself a job?"
But, y'know, I enjoy it so I do it, y'know
I have to admit it scares a lot of girls
When I ask them out for dates

Y'know, I can, I can imagine if I ever had a wife
I wonder what she'd think of something like that
I can understand her, y'know, I once had a girl—like most girls Have left me because I do that, ehhm
It's hurt me in my life, but not all girls have

And it's kinda hard on a girl for a guy to go out
And make a fool out of himself every day, like,
I guess that's what I've been doing, anyw—
I wouldn't call it making a fool because a lot of kids are happy—

I sing them "Merry-Go-Round" and they go home and sing it
And everybody's happy in the neighborhood—I sing, you know, Whatever song comes to my head

But I don't wanna do—I m— I figu— I'm through doing that
I don't wanna do—I mean, like—
I just don't wanna do that Anymore, y'know?

Well I wanna do other things like make records 'n TV shows
And get married and stuff like that, y'know
But, y'know, I just like normal things in life

If the people don't like me then I'll drop out of the music scene b— I think I'll go out eventually, get married and get a job
But if the people like me, I plan to be around this business for a long time and uh I want the people to decide

I don't want anybody to force it on 'em, I don't want, y'know, Anybody to say, well, "He's gonna be the greatest
Greater than the Beatles and Elvis Presley" or anything like that
I think that the people should decide where I'm at

If they like me, they should go out and buy my records
If they don't like me, they shouldn't buy my records.
'Scuse me, I gotta tie my shoe now—Are you rollin'?
Don't roll, don't roll, I gotta tie my shoe