Sayori vs. Kaede Akamatsu

[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATLES OF HISTORY
KAEDE AKAMATSU
VS
SAYORI
BEGIN

[Verse 1: Sayori & The Announcer ]
Ummm, excuse me, it's not Say-ori What?
It's Sa-yo-ri, I'M SORRY, don't worry!
But matching a talented writer against a piano freak?
I sold my free game and made millions the first week!
It's true I ain't through with MC and I'm trying to confess
But you're one MC I'm not fucking with! Unless..?
Took a look at your games and I don't mean to be dramatic
But minors killing each other? That's problematic!
The difference between us two is that I don't kill people
I may scare them near death, but murder is just pure evil!
Of course they'll pin crimes onto you when they discuss
You go around hopping on vents bitch, and that's kinda sus!
If you don't like me, well you can come and sue me
But at the end of the day, you're faker than Tsumugi
Your playing's bad that I'm not surprised when
You go "game/script-ch5.rpy", line 310

[Verse 2: Kaede]
I'm the Ultimate Pianist, yeah I'll be on beat
Even if you're feeling down, you can't sleep on me!
Just think of how your parents will feel without their daughter
You’re depressed? Dude, just take walks and drink water!
You were so boring your bestie left thee hanging by a thread
Is it My Immortal or your poems that I've read?
"Deeper and deeper my fingers go." I don't get what's being said…
You scream "get out of my head," but at least I get more head!
I asked your club president and even she agrees
That you sound like you're used to getting killed by MCs!
Wait, the MC didn't do that now that I mention…
Maybe I'm like your players: No reading comprehension
Your bars sound like your game's music: Pathetic
I'll cut you up like Yuri's wrists, fuck your depressed aesthetic
By now you should have pushed aside the chair
So I'll gently open the door and- oh you're still there

[verse 3: Sayori]
You couldn't kill Rantaro, there were problems with that planning
Tried to calm your group down, poor Kaede was left hanging
Then she left a boy crying because he couldn't tap her
I'd invite you to my club but you died in the first chapter!
They hate you more than Haiji for being irresponsible
I'm talking about the guy that likes them young as possible!
[Depressed tone] And DV3's just buggy, like me and Gokuhara
Played you like your execution, as I say Sayo-nara

[Verse 4: Kaede]
W-w... what in the hell was that?
Who the fuck commits suicide during a batle rap?
This brings a new meaning to when a rapper chokes
But I'll help a new musician, let me show you the rop- erk! [gets hanged, chokes thru da verse]
My death will affect everyone through the entire game
You killed yourself and everything stayed the same!
And even when you gain your sentience, you still end up losing
Our hearts are like your poems: They have stopped moving

[Outro: The Announcer & Monika]
WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE
EPIC-
Hmmm, maybe it'd be easier if I just...
Heh… BATLES OF HISTORY!