Great Big Stuff

[FREDDY]
I thought I'd seen it all
I thought I knew the score
But coming here, I've found a world
I'd never seen before
Now I know where I belong-
A life of taste and class
With culture and sophistication
Pouring out my ass!

(spoken)
What do I want? I want this. I want this! Ah, I want this!

(sung)
I thought I had a real gift
That penny-ante grift
But Freddy's gettin' ready now
To give his life a lift
I'm tired of bein' a chump!
I wanna be like Trump
Two hundred pounds of caviar in one gigantic lump
Gimme—

[FREDDY & ENSEMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
This is how I gotta live

[FREDDY & ENSEMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Uh-uh no alternative

[FREDDY & ENSEMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
I want my silver spoon
Don't need it right now
But I better get it soon

Ah-ha! Uh huh, uh huh...

I want a mansion with a moat
Around which, I will float
With some vast-bottom babies
In my glass-bottom boat

[FREDDY/HOUSEKEEPERS]
A house in the Bahamas

[FREDDY]
Paisley silk pajamas
Poker with Al Roker
And our friend Lorenzo Lamas!
Gimme—

[FREDDY & ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
I really do deserve it

[FREDDY & ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
With servants who will serve it

[FREDDY & ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
I don't give a damn what it's fer
Every day's my birthday
Every night is my Bar Mitzver!

Oh!

Oh, give me a home
Where the centerfolds roam
Guccione on the phone, he
Got a party going on!

And Hef'll have me over
To play some naked Twister
Blotto in the Grotto
With a Playmate and her sister!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Rap stars'll love me!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Get me a posse, a'ight?

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Chillin' in the city
Sittin' pretty in the caddy
With P. Daddy or Puff Diddy

(spoken)
Or whatever! I'll change my name too! I'll get my hatchback all pimped-out...

(sung)
The Islands in the winter
The Hamptons in the summer
The fashion plate I date'll give me
Hummers in my Hummer

The cash to keep me idle
The chicks to keep me vital
The pills to keep me happy
Even when I'm suicidal

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Nothin crass or crappy

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
That would make me very happy

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Bring it out and make it snappy

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
I want some really classy shit!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Like a mink tracksuit!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
My own personal Zamboni!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Lot's of unnecessary surgery!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
I can finally afford to see a Broadway show!

[ENSMBLE]
Great big stuff!

[FREDDY]
Gout!

[ENSMBLE, contrapuntally]
Great big stuff
Great big stuff
Great big stuff
Great big stuff

[FREDDY, spoken]
I just want someone to love me...
For my money!

[ALL]
Yeah!