Allan Red vs Squidward Tentacles

[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATLES OF HISTORY
ALLAN RED
VS
SQUIDWARD TENTACLES
BEGIN

[Verse 1: Allan]
Hi… I’m Allan
I don't really want to do this rap challenge
I’ll hose him with some dirty brown wa-ter
Make you blow up once I commence the slaugh-ter
I’m not surprised about the torture you’ve got-ten
Your art sucks and your patties taste rot-ten
I saw you steal them at the Krusty Krab
But you set off some stuff in the back such as gas
I’m going hard on this cypher
I bet you’re called Smelly cause you shit in your diapers
I'd tell you to call our service
But we couldn’t convince ourselves that you're not worthless

[Verse 2: Squidward]
I dunno a way to write against this lean guy
When my episodes are longer than his screen time
I hate your show - it’s so unfunny
You’re only there because you’re all out of MONEY
Stepping to me is quite bold and brash
So step away unless you want six feet up your ass
I saw your wife; gee, she looked really gross
But like you did with Charlie; I’d still let her suck my nose
So eat my cheeks like it’s Tortellini
And hang at the Hut Jr since you’re already a weenie

[Verse 3: Allan]
Oh my goodness Squidward
You sound like a SoundCloud rapper when you spit words
Every day you bitch about your dumb-ass life
Then blame the world ‘cause you can’t play your pipe

[Verse 4: Squidward]
Oh puh-lease, what’s that glare for?
I’m so fly while you’re just stuck at the airport
Your only struggle is a paper clip and you still wanna rattle?
Step into your rocket boots and fly out of this batle

[Verse 5: Allan]
That verse was garbage, you will die alone
You should use that long nose to tinker with your microphone
Clip your paper together so you can write lines hotter
Or you’ll get an appointment with Doctor Monster
Your show sucks, but that's fine by me
I watch your modern seasons just to find my cheese
You don’t wanna mess with me when I get pissed
Take it from Red, if you killed yourself, you wouldn't be Mist

[Verse 6: Squidward]
From the way you talk to your partner
To the way you only compliment your pals if they acknowledge your smarts
If you wanted to send the snowman somewhere cold
You should've sent him deep to your rotten heart
So go play some Burnout Revenge on the PS2
If you can't read the sheet music then I don't wanna talk to you
Scream as loud as you want to your boss
It won't prevent you from ending up on a cross

[Outro: The Announcer and the cool autistic gamer 774]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
Hmm... well, what did you think about this batle, the cool autistic gamer 774?
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