Daffy Duck’s Rhapsody

Greetings!
My name is Daffy
There's no other duck like me
Because I'm so daffy
And the reason I'm daffy
And so gosh-derned riff-raffy
And so screwy and laffy
Is because those hunters won't leave me alone

Oh, why don't they hunt some other animal for a change?
So, that I won't have to end up on a kitchen range
But no, duck hunting's all the rage and they won't let me be
And I'm so full of bullets, I'm lit up like a Christmas tree
There's so much I'd like to do if I just had the chance
I'd like to play and romp and even sing and do a dance

I would read the latest book
Go swimming in the babbling brook
I'd like to fly the seven seas
Play hide and seek among the trees
I'd play hop scotch and double dutch
And this and that and things and such
I know that isn't asking much
But all these things I daresn't touch

It's bang! bang! here, and bang! bang! there
Bullets flying everywhere
I can't stand it any longer
I get weak and they get stronger

Hunters to the right of me
Hunters to the left I see
Over hill and over dale
Bullets whizzing past my tail

There's no rest and there's no peace
Won't this shooting ever cease
Morning, noon, and through the night
That's why I look such a fright

BANG! BANG! BANG!
I'm only sixteen yards ahead
BANG! BANG! BANG!
They're shooting straight at me

HOO! HOO! HOO!
They won't let up until I'm dead
HOO! HOO! HOO!
Why can't they let me be?

Why don't they hunt big wild moose
Or chase a reindeer on the loose
There's possums, chipmunks, caribou
Or rabbit for a rabbit stew
Raccoons, squirrels, porcupines
Monkeys swinging on the vines
Leopards with or without spots
Wildcats with or without dots
Elephants, badgers, kangaroos
Lions, tigers, cows that moo
Wolf and mice and prairie ox
Red and grey and silver fox

DAFFY! They drive me daffy!
Those hunters with their great big guns
They're all uncles, cousins, fathers, sons
Crazy! They got me hazy
With all that rootin'-flootin'-hootin'-tootin'-high-falootin' noisy
Shootin'
Closer! They're gettin' closer
With shotguns, pistols, bows and arrows, rifles, knives, and other
Deadly trifles
Scram now! While I'm still able
You're nuts if you think that I'm gonna end up on somebody's dinner table

Sooooo, Good-bye!
So long now!
Woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo...