Romance

When I first fell in love I thought
My whole existence would now be fraught
With ecstasy, felicity, blessed content
It would be different

I got ready to climb up the balc-
ony of my beloved, with after-shaving lotion and a dab of talc
Behind my ear, couple of pints of beer, clean underpants
This was romance

And she was waiting for me there with some egg on her chin
I dreamed she'd have a rose in her hair and she'd be softly plucking at a mandolin
To tell you the truth, there wasn't a rose
And as a matter of fact, she was plucking her nose