Another Dead Cow

[MAGGIE]
Boys, it’s time for you to wake up and smell the music,
we obviously got ourselves a predicament.

[BUD]
Alright, I admit it!
Bossie’s thin as a fishing pole…

[NED]
Bessie’s flat as a flounder…

[ROY]
Little Bonnie, God rest her soul was barely one quarter pounder!

[BUD]
I checked my bovine manual and I find no definition

[BUD & NED]
Even this revised edition, does not mention malnutrition

[ROY]
Gussie died of a hacking cough
Clara drowned in the feeding trough

[ALL]
Why would the Lord wanna carry them off
Dang!
We’ve got another dead cow, and the rent is overdue…

[BUD]
We’re facing poverty!

[ALL]
Got another dead cow, and we’re up to twenty-two

[ROY]
Better make that twenty-three

[ALL]
Sweet Jesus now I’m petrified

[NED]
They're gonna repossess my double-wide!

[ALL]
Got another dead cow and I’m thinking of blaming -

[MAGGIE]
You wanna be watchin that kinda talk
let's not go there
let's guide this train of thought back toward the depot
we’ve gotta figure out what's wrong with these cows

[ALL]
Something's making 'em cough and wheeze
Slowly drivin them to their knees

[BUD]
It’s gotta be some contagious disease

[ALL]
A PLAGUE!
We got another dead cow
and we don’t know why they die

[MAGGIE]
We’ve got to find the link

[ALL]
Got another dead cow
and apocalypse draws nigh!

[BUD]
You went to college; think!

[ALL]
Well, something's bound to raise a flag!

[LORRAINE]
Like the little bat boy they found in the bag?

[ALL]
Got another dead c...
Got another de...
Got ano...
G...

Got another dead cow
but I'm telling you now
I’m making a vow
by the sweat of my brow
gonna figure out who
and what and how and why!

[ROY]
Maybe it’s this rotten plague

[ALL]
Why...

[BUD]
Think Dr. Parker will put it down

[ALL]
Why...

[LORRAINE]
Dr. Parker is a good man

[ALL]
Why...

[LORRAINE]
He’ll just kill it

[ALL]
Why…