Summertime

Summertime... summertime blues is what I have. You know why? Don't like the fucking summertime. 'kay? Think it sucks. Hot, sticky, sucks. Hot, sticky, sucks. 'kay? 'kay. People love the summertime because people are *baaaa* sheep. Good, good answer, sir. Thank you. "It's summertime, so good! It's hot and sticky! Huh huh!" I don't fucking get it, man. I gotta retire all my cool jackets for another fucking season, you know. I don't have to do that but I don't wanna be, you know, hanging out in a leather jacket, 90 degrees. That ain't cool. It's... HOT AND STICKY. Yes, sir, thank you. Good answer.

Everyone goes to the bеach. What is the- What is the- I don't get thе beach. "Where you going?" "The beach." "God, I'd love to go to the beach." "Man, we could just go to the beach." "God... what do you wanna do? Go to the beach?" "Yeah." "Oh, if I could live at the beach. Can you imagine that? Living at the beach!?" What's the fucking deal with- It's where dirt meets water, alright? Chill out. That's it. End of fascination. I've got a bathtub and an imagination. I'm staying indoors this summer, alright? That way I can listen to music I like.

I don't know. Maybe I'm jealous. Everyone at the beach is perfect. Tan, white teeth. I've got white skin, tan teeth, you know... Not my environment. You put me under a neon beer light, I look pretty fucking cool. Use of those blinking ones? Woo! Stud muffin. The fucking beach... I'm so pale, man. I take my shirt off at the beach, it's like a prism. People just, "Bill, put your shirt back on! We can't find our towels!" All these moths are bumping into me...

Boy, moths are weird. You ever wonder what moths bumped into before electric light bulbs were invented? Boy, the... light bulb really fucked the moth up, didn't it? First light bulb ever turned on, billions of moths... *frantic tapping* What? I don't get the appeal. What's the fucking deal with that, huh? What did they do before? Like, are their moths on the way to the sun right now going, "It's gonna be worth it!" That's a hell of a commute, man. I don't wish that upon my little moth buddies!

I just don't feel well, man. I had to set my alarm for this show, so you... gives you an idea of what kind of excitement I lead during the day.