​​nonchalant.

[Intro]
Ken, I fucking hate you

[Verse 1]
Nonchalant not numb, I still feel it fucking all now
Smoke next to my gums, imma put it in my lungs now
Near me is a gun, I might really need to calm down
I ain't seen the sun, I be sleeping when it comes out
Can't move on, I'm not ready, you got one shot, keep it steady
If you miss you will not have a chance again
Don't look so but I am pissed, I don't think I can make amends

[Chorus]
Keep on keeping on, heart so heavy, hate been leaking on, it's so deadly
I don't wanna run for the rest of my life
Feeling like this isn't fun, made a mess of my life
I don't wanna know where I could be
I can never know where I would be till it's too late
Only when I look back, I can rеally see the way
That old me should of could act

[Verse 2]
Every timе that I wake up, I wish I didn't
I know I should open up but imma keep it hidden
You won't like what you see inside me
Will I ever learn how to keep it all behind me?
You say don't look at it like that but I stay looking at it like that
Will it end? Should I really even fight back?
Don't like where I been, how the fuck I take my life back?

[Chorus]
Keep on keeping on, heart so heavy, hate been leaking on, it's so deadly
I don't wanna run for the rest of my life
Feeling like this isn't fun, made a mess of my life
I don't wanna know where I could be
I can never know where I would be till it's too late
Only when I look back I can really see the way
That old me should of could act