Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord &
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord
Schäffer the Darklord & & Jesse Dangerously & YTCracker & Coolzey & Adam WarRock & Dr. Awkward & MC Frontalot
Schäffer the Darklord
(SC:)
Hey what up? Strict Chem coming at ya from the West Coast
(Schaffer:)
In the year 2000, long before I was the Darklord
I was a drummer in bands, heavy metal, hard core
I was young and restless, I lived in San Francisco
I wrote crappy rhymes over lousy instrumentals on my four track
No Pro-tools, couldn't afford that
Dreamed of my own rap act, didn't know no rap cats
Too half-assed to solo, so my friend Ricki asked me
(SC & STD:)
If I would like to meet her(/my) friend, Katasrophe
(STD:)
He was a performance poet, and a handsome kid
Well connected, ambitious, and mad talented
He didn't build beats, I barely wrote rhymes
But we could make magic with our skills combined
So I was like "Hey", and he was like (K:)"Hey"
He had a pair of friends who were pornographers and they
Needed a hot track stat for their latest flick
So we wrote one and the chorus went just like this:
(STD & K:)
I got candy cane dreams, sugar coated schemes
A life that screams decadence, (SC: What?) duh-duh-duh-duh
This phase won't ever pass
These sweets are cold kickin' my candy ass
(STD:)
And that was that (SC: Unh), but it turned out shit
Well the movie but not the music man, the jam was legit
We wrote a dozen others, in our minds all of them pearls
And we called our brand new rap group The End of the World
We brought Ricki on as hype man, did a bunch of shows (SC: Hey)
Amassed a bunch of fans and shot a music video
We toured across the country and stresses were felt
We split up to pursue solo acts by ourselves
My new stuff grew humorous, satanic
Katastrophe blew up, toured trans-atlantic
I moved to New York and later he did too
So I called him up, "Man what you been up to?"
(Katastrophe:)
Well since the last time we spoke,(STD:Yeah?!) I stopped doing coke (STD: Oh?!)
I no longer drink (STD: No?!), I don't even smoke (STD: Word)
And now I can think straight, wait has it been since '08
Since we had a real conversation? (SC: Yeah)
Mostly I've been spendin' my time, travelling the nation spittin' rhymes
Unraveling situations with women, makin' dimes
I've had good times, and some super bad
Oh man, did I tell you I'm a new dad?
Just kiddin' I still don't have semen but I'm California Dreamin'
On the east coast not to boast I was schemin' in team with a dude named Amos
Made a magazine, and now we're kind of both famous but only in a certain scene
So I lack green, I live beyond my means (STD: Yeah?)
But hey, it's the American way and friends say it's end days
I don't mean to trouble you, but I think we should let them all know it's the EOTW
(STD & K:)
It's the end of the world (SC: Wha?)
It's the end of the world (SC: Wha?)
Total Armageddon, it's the end of the world as we know it (SC: Yeah)
We show it to you, brimstone and fire
Apocalypse now and not a single survivor
(SC: Come on!)
It's the end of the world (SC: Wha?)
It's the end of the world (SC: Wha?)
Total Armageddon, it's the end of the world as we know it (SC: Yeah)
We show it to you, brimstone and fire
Apocalypse now and not a single survivor
(STD:)
It seems we've both come a long ways, in our respective old age
But talking to you makes me nostalgic for those old days
(K:)
I can still picture the first time we shared a stage
SF Pride Fest, The Butchies drummer played
(STD:)
Remember Out Fest in LA and those Balazo shows?
(K:)
Candyass, Black Metal Queen, and hella ho's
(STD:)
You got into a fist fight with two in Missoula right?
(K:)
Oh yeah that's right, I almost forgot that night
We played with Mates of State, were met with blank stares and hate
(STD:)
But in our suits and pink capes, we still looked hella great
Ricki, drunk, would introduce us. Man I really miss her!
(K:)
I made out with your girlfriend
(STD:)
I made you with your sister
(K:)
We watched the Anna Nicole show in a hotel suite
(STD:)
You made me a better rapper
(K:)
You taught me how to make beats
(STD:)
Maybe we should write a new song, in which we reminisce
(K:)
Yes! And the last chorus can go just like this
(SC: Come on!)
(STD & K:)
The world is, the world is, the world is
Gonna end, you can pretend that it won't, but it will
If you don't catch a thrill before it's over you'll blow it
Last chance for decadence, you know it
(SC: Come on!)
The world is, the world is, the world is
Gonna end, you can pretend that it won't, but it will
If you don't catch a thrill before it's over you'll blow it
Last chance for decadence, you know it
(SC: Come on!)
I got candy cane dreams (SC:Wha?), sugar coated schemes (SC:Wha?)
A life that screams decadence, (SC: Yeah) duh-duh-duh-duh
This phase won't ever pass
These sweets are cold kickin' my candy ass
(SC: Come on!)
I got candy cane dreams (SC:Wha?), sugar coated schemes (SC:Wha?)
A life that screams decadence, (SC: Yeah) duh-duh-duh-duh
This phase won't ever pass
These sweets are cold kickin' my candy ass
(STD, K, SC: Unh!)
(SC: Word. That's it. Peace.)