Don’t Blame the Culchies

[Chorus]
Don't blame the culchies because they didn't fail
It's not their fault that they were born outside the Pale
Don't blame the culchies because they've only one pair of kaks
And they spend all their money down the town in Supermac's

[Verse 1]
Growin' up there in two channel land
Spuds for brekkie, lunch and dinner was all a pretty plan
And then the EU came along to give them a helping hand
So don't worry about the culchies with thеir [?] grand

What's it about culchies and coleslaw?
The rеst of the world's moved on
What is it with them?
Coleslaw and chips?
It's just wrong

[Chorus]
Don't blame the culchies because they didn't fail
It's not their fault that they were born outside the Pale
Don't blame the culchies because they've only one pair of kaks
And they spend all their money down the town in Supermac's

[Verse 2]
They're up here in Dublin cause they're up for the shoppin'
And they're down to Copper Face Jacks for the boppin'
All the guards and the nurses holdin' on to their purses
Lookin' at the LUAS wonderin' "where's the horses?"

Where's the horses?
Where's the horses?
They still love Marian, Maxy and Gay
These are the people that gave us Jackie Healy Rae
They each have a vote so they're gonna have their say
We even gave them an Irish language channel
"Súil eile," as they say

We used to send them to England
Now they've jobs of their own
But they still pack eighteen in a house
Down around Athlone

[Chorus]
Don't blame the culchies because they didn't fail
It's not their fault that they were born outside the Pale
Don't blame the culchies because they've only one pair of kaks
And they spend all their money down the town in Supermac's

[Verse 3]
In a land where lemonade has two colours
It's not fair to be blaming all the Mullas
With the high tractor factor every word's a mile away
"If you go down the road as far as the eye can see
Turn left at the cow in the field
If you see Biddy from the shop on her bike
Turn right at the phone box and come back again"

[Chorus]
Don't blame the culchies because they didn't fail
It's not their fault that they were born outside the Pale
Don't blame the culchies because they've only one pair of kaks
And they spend all their money down the town in Supermac's

[Verse 4]
The culchies think the Chinese put gravy on your chips
And that ginger chancer Hector is still considered hip
Don't blame the culchies, they had a little we had a lot
God luck to them findin' a decent feed in Fingal fulla snot

Yeah don't blame the culchies
Sure who else would do agriculture science?
Yeah, ag science, learning how to feed hay to a cow

[Chorus]
Don't blame the culchies because they didn't fail
It's not their fault that they were born outside the Pale
Don't blame the culchies because they've only one pair of kaks
And they spend all their money down the town in Supermac's