Can I Be Okay Now?

I still feel your hands at night
I still get the chills at times
And I fear for the worst of me

I still feel the rage I had
I still get the panic attacks
And I fear for the worst of me

Can I be okay now?
Or do I have to suffer some more?
Can I be saved now?
Or am I gonna wash up on shore?
Can I be okay now?
Or will I hurt some more?

I still feel the cold these days
No one there, and I’m falling again
And I fear for the worst of me

I still feel the chain around my neck
Crying that night as I laid in my bed
Thinking “I should have let my body free”

Can I be okay now?
Or do I have to suffer some more?
Can I be saved now?
Or am I gonna wash up ashore
Every waking moment I’ve had
Is making me insane
Almost every thought that I have
Is just more pain
So can I be okay now?
Or will I hurt some more?

Oh! I’m never gonna go home am I?
Oh! I’m never gonna smile am I?
Why does this keep happening?
Why am I still suffering?
Oh! I think I should just go to sleep

I saw them, white as a ghost
They almost had to go
And I fear for the worst

Can I be okay now?
Or do I have to suffer some more?
Can I be saved now?
Or am I gonna wash up ashore
Every waking moment I’ve had
Is making me insane
Almost every thought that I have
Is just more pain
So can I be okay now?
Or will I hurt some more?