Facts/Forgiveness and Wishes

Verse 1:
Saying I'm enough but I don't think that I am
Don't know if I'll make it out, even if I ran
Give you a grin when you ask how my day goes
Like if you care anyway, I'm trapped in my shadows
And I know everyday we spent was a task
Don't know how to say it but goddamn it didn't last
I'm sorry for what I did to you, sorry for causing pain
If you let me stay the night, I promise, I'll explain
Thank you to those who are really there
Thank you J for showing that you care
But finding happiness for me is really rare
Feeling like I'm stuck, I was never prepared
Telling me I did nothing wrong when you know I did
Does my mom regret me coming out? Cuz I wish I never lived

(instrumental)

Verse 2:
They won't ever understand me or my pain, just please go away
Don't really need you, don't need you in my way
Loving then losing
Breathing then dying
Then comes no hope, I feel it, not lying
A smile, it comes, it goes just like a blink
Just expressing myself, it's what I think
Fuck all the people who hurt me
Fuck them lies, it won't haunt me
Don't need you, I'm strong
Without you I'm better, not wrong
Wish I could actually feel this way
But I can't so I feel nothing but pain