Susan Ford

[AMY CARTER]
You’re the coolest girl out of all the girls
Who have ever lived in the White House
Susan Ford

[SUSAN FORD]
So?

[AMY]
You’re the coolest girl out of any girl
Ever born or raised in the White House
Susan Ford

[SUSAN]
Okay, and?

[AMY]
Plus, we have a lot in common

[SUSAN]
We do?

[AMY]
My dad’s the president
Yours was, too
Plus, you have a Siamese cat
And I have a Siamese cat
What are the chances of that?
What are the chances that I’d ever get to hang
With Susan Ford?
The coolest girl out of all the girls
Who have ever lived in the White House

[SUSAN]
I’m not sure I like being trapped in a 12-year-old’s dream

[AMY]
Your mom doesn’t care if you smoke pot
That’s cool

[ROSALYNN CARTER]
Amy!

[AMY]
Your mom doesn’t care if you have sex before you’re married
That’s cool

[ROSALYNN]
Amy!

[AMY]
Your mom doesn’t care if you draw nipples on your Barbie

[ROSALYNN]
Amy, I told you not to do that

[AMY]
Did you draw nipples on your Barbie?

[SUSAN]
Yeah

[AMY]
See, you’re cool
I bet you’re never bored
‘Cause you’re the absolutely coolest girl
Of any girl who’s ever been the daughter
Of a president,
Who’s ever lived in the White House
Susan Ford
Susan Ford
Susan Ford

[SUSAN]
So, technically, I’m being held prisoner in your dream?

[AMY]
No, not really a prisoner - a guest
Let’s play movie star
Can I wear your sunglasses?

[SUSAN]
What if you wake up?

[AMY]
Then I go right back to sleep,
And the whole dream would start again

[SUSAN]
Oh God
What if in your dream you had an accident
Or you’re killed?
They say if you’re killed in your dream
You die in real life

[BETTY FORD]
Susan, let’s not monkey with the child
Should Susan see a therapist?

[ROSALYNN]
Well, I don’t know

[BETTY]
You’re the mental health First Lady
That’s why I ask

[SUSAN]
I don’t need to see a therapist, Mother
You do

[BETTY]
Ever since your husband defeated my husband,
Susan hasn’t been the same
She took it awful hard

[SUSAN]
Daddy should still be president

[BETTY]
Blame Dick Nixon, honey, not Jimmy Carter