Star Wars Recap Song

[Intro]
Star Wars has returned
To resume its storyline
Between the last film and now
Well, it's been a long long time

If you've forgotten anything
We'll remind you now
In a very detailed recap
Of how it all went down...

[Verse 1]
Escape pod to Tatooine
Jawas, sentient machines
Young Skywalker, sunset scene
R2 and sandpeople scream

Obi Wan in long dark robes
Must repair C-3P0
"Obi Wan you're my only hope!"
Uncle Owen! Aunt ooh… nope!

Mos Eisley
Lots of weirdos
Not the droids as far as we know
Han shoots first
Bye bye Greedo
Chewie, jump up to lightspeed go!

Alderaan to smithereens
"That's no moon"
Tractor beam
Dress up as the other team
To save the captured future queen

Dodging blasters
Trash compactor
Quote off between duelling actors
Wayward student slays his master
Must escape but must go faster

TIE Fighters, hot pursuit
"Don't get cocky, kid, just shoot!"
Yavin Four
Prep the troops
"May the Force be with you, Luke."

Plus red 10, 3, 6, ET AL
Torpedoes miss
Computer's fault
Use the Force now, Luke don't stall!
Vader! Falcon!
Phew! Close call

Death Star goes klabooey!
Everyone get out there zoomy
Medals for their royal duty
Han and Luke but, eh, not Chewie

[Hook]
Star Wars, Star Wars
This is everything that happens in
Star Wars, Star Wars

[Verse 2]
Ice planet
Wampa cave
Obi Wan beyond the grave
Solo in the blizzard, brave
Tauntaun guts
Luke is saved!

Back to base of frozen water
Nerf herder
Kiss that's awkward
Star Destroyers
Giant walkers
Lots and lots of rebels slaughtered

Asteroids!
Take a breather
Rawr! Enormous phallic creature!
To Dagobah Luke!
Where you'll meet your ancient Muppet Jedi teacher

Physical and mental training
Vader vision
Yoda's phrasing
"Do or do not"
X-Wing raising
Whoop! Gotta go!
Friends need saving

Cloud city, wariness
Once more 3P0's a mess
Darth teams up with Boba Fett
As the world's worst dinner guests

Luke is on his way, although
Carbonite for poor Han Solo
Altered deal
Dammit Lando!
Awesome kiss
"I love you."
"I know."

[Bridge]
Luke and Vader, this is it
Epic battle, trading hits
Sabers clash, pop and fizz
Nothing is as cool as this
Vader cuts him at the wrist
High above an endless pit
Dark Side pitches
Luke resists
"I am your father."
Holy shit!!!

[Hook]
Star Wars, Star Wars
This is everything that happens in
Star Wars, Star Wars

[Verse 3]
Jabba's palace, next vendetta
Chewie captured, plan develops
Leia's bounty hunter getup
Unfreeze Han, but it's a setup!

Luke shows up in Tatooine-y
Leia's super hot bikini
Rancor fight
That bikini
Sarlacc pit
That bikini...

Walk the plank
But the plan is set
Green lightsaber catch, no sweat!
Jabba grossly choked to death
The same is true for Boba Fett

To Dagobah Luke retreats
Master Yoda dies in peace
Kenobi paints a family tree
Remember that one kissing scene?

Death Star almost good to go
The Emperor now joins the show
Endor is more frightening though
With Teddy Bears with bows and arrows!

Luke gets caught, confronts his Dad
"Come with me, you're not all bad!"
Rebels move in to attack
The Death Star, but oops
"It's a trap!"

One more saber fight's a given
Vader's hand cut, Symbolism!!!
Lightning fingers
Indecision
Vader toss, and all's forgiven!

Bonding quick before it blows
Remove the helmet
Ugh, it's gross
Endor dancing
Happy ghosts
And that is how the story goes!

[Outro]
Star Wars, Star Wars
That was everything that happened in
Star Wars, Star Wars
There were only three instalments of
Star Wars, Star Wars
Don't look any further into it
Star Wars, Star Wars
Star Wars!