Pick Up The Pieces

[Verse 1: Taboo]
I don’t even know why I’m writing this letter—like
Putting it in plain sight would make you decipher it better
Ever since I can remember, I dismembered
My mind trying to find the lies that lie in the center
And it feels like forever—it really does—since
I saw clearly who the real me was—that’s
My theory. Now I’m starting to feel these drugs ‘cause I
Betrayed someone that I sincerely loved
Now I’m trying to numb the pain before it takes me in a downward spiral
‘Cause when she said she hated me, that sort of sounded final
It was all ego and self-praise ‘til I found a bible
And turned to the page that said, “Son, denounce them idols”
There’s devils in my mental and pagans in my playpen
That break bread with, um, say, ten versions of Satan
A basement for the baseheads who don’t know to say when
And a closet full of skeletons who refuse to stay dead
Y’all have seen it’s some sort of fiendish, distorted genius
Who crash and burn fast into the earth like a fallen phoenix
Placed my faith in a faltered thesis. Now I’m at
The altar, calling Jesus, watching my world fall to pieces
I would think y’all are smart. Big-headed
Should have known I needed a shrink from the start. I just
Cling to the part where I bring all this heart
On a Quest for love, but Black Thoughts make Things Fall Apart

[Hook: Taboo]
I have been beat down, I’m just
Tryna make it back to my feet now
Lost in the meanwhile, I’m just
Tryna bounce back on the rebound
Help is what I need now, but it
Slips from my grip when I reach out
They say that talk is cheap now. Why does it
Cost so much when I speak out?

[Verse 2: Taboo]
And someone once said, “Let’s see what you’re made of”
And since then, I’ve been thinking of myself: shit, ain’t much
I feel like a fake fuck under a pound of clown makeup
Filled with a great flood of hate, so it’s impossible to make love
I take drugs just to numb my senses, I’ve been
Filled with a disgusting vengeance, and it’s become relentless
Trying to find a sense of justice, just a semblance
Feel like I’m cuffed on benches, waiting on the judge’s sentence
Adjust my lenses, I see deceptive purposes
I’m further from acceptance—you should expect some turbulence
It gets disturbing quick, I’m a wreck with nervousness
To the point I gotta avoid all reflective surfaces
I’ve been spinning gold since I was a minute old
But every time the truth got twisted, it took a horrific toll
My vivid soul lost its inner globe, looking like
A little withered rose by a frozen river in the bitter cold
Plant a seed in the sea, watch that shit grow
Infected to the root ‘cause of the truths that I withhold
So it goes: that once luminous spectrum
Of his soul has slowly been reduced to a dim glow
I tiptoe through the old days, I miss those
I didn’t know that the human heart could be this cold
Fingers on the edge of the cliff, watching them slip slow
Kick the bottom brick out this fucker, watch the structure implode

[Hook: Taboo]
I have been beat down, I’m just
Tryna make it back to my feet now
Lost in the meanwhile, I’m just
Tryna bounce back on the rebound
Help is what I need now, but it
Slips from my grip when I reach out
They say that talk is cheap now. Why does it
Cost so much when I speak out?

[Verse 3: Taboo]
I remember the place but caught a case of amnesia
Half-assed dreamer looking at the path, thinking the grass greener
Running cheetah-fast to the mass preacher tryna
Clean my spirit like taking glass-cleaner to damn Zima
Zoom in partially, see the demons who choose to spar with me
And a spot I was shot through my foolish heart with Cupid’s archery
Losing horribly to the stupid that moves lethargically
Through my arteries, consuming the only human part of me
Watching them feelings kill him slow, he
Wants to stay, but he really knows he still should go
Such an actor, it’s only natural I steal the show
Wrote my life story and casted myself in a villain role
I wasn’t built to deal with this type of bullshit
Had a bright idea, but you know that that light gets dull quick, been
Running from my problems. Only time I bite the bullet is if
I should pull it out, put it in my mouth, and ignite the full clip
This gamble for my life was expected sooner
Been rolling stone-cold snake eyes since the first time I met Medusa
Pathetic loser that went and wrecked his future. These
Reckless maneuvers are gonna take some getting used to
But I’m at the point when never becomes forever
Trying my best not to run or succumb to this numbing weather
Things fall apart when contents under pressure
But at least you can pick up them pieces and build something better