Lonesome Cowboy Nando

Frank Zappa (lead guitar, synthesizer, vocals)
Ike Willis (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Mike Keneally (rhythm guitar, synthesizer, vocals)
Bobby Martin (keyboards, vocals)
Ed Mann (vibes, marimba, electronic percussion)
Walt Fowler (trumpet, flugel horn, synthesizer)
Bruce Fowler (trombone)
Paul Carman (alto saxophone, soprano saxophone, baritone saxophone)
Albert Wing (tenor saxophone)
Kurt McGettrick (baritone saxophone, bass saxophone, contrabass clarinet)
Scott Thunes (electric bass, mini-moog)
Chad Wackerman (drums, electronic percussion)
Jimmy Carl Black (vocals)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals)
Jim Pons (bass, vocals)
Don Preston (keyboards, electronics)
Ian Underwood (keyboards, saxophone)
Aynsley Dunbar (drums)

Frank:
My name is Nando
I'm a marine biologist
All my friends
They call me "Doh"

Ike & Mike:
Hi, Doh!

Frank:
All my family
From someplace in this area
And they complain if I talk about this horrible pizza
During the show

All:
Come out here, to Californy
Just to find me some pretty girls
Ones I seen gets me so horny
Ruby lips, 'n teeth like pearls

Wanna love 'em all, wanna love 'em dearly
Wanna a jellyfish, I'll even pay
I'll buy 'em furs, I'll buy 'em pizza
I know they like me, here's what I'll say:

(1971:)

Jimmy Carl Black:
I'm lonesome cowboy Burt
Speakin' atcha!
Won'tcha smell my fringe-y shirt?
Reekin' atcha!
My cowboy pants
My cowboy dance
My bold advance
On this here waitress...

Mark & Howard:
He's lonesome cowboy Burt. A-Ha!
Don'tcha get his feelings hurt

Jimmy:
Come on in this place
An' I'll buy you a taste
You can sit on my face
Where's my waitress?

Mark & Howard:
Burtram, Burtram redneck!
Burtram, Burtram redneck!

Jimmy:
I'm an awful nice guy
Worked all day in the sun
I'm a roofer by trade
Quite a bundle I've made
I'm a unionized roofin' old son-of-a-gun

Mark & Howard:
He's a unionized roofin' old son of a gun!

(1988:)

Ike:
"Darling, I crazy go nuts when I hear this
You know what I'm sayin'?"

Frank:
When I get off, I get plastered
I swim till I fall on the jellyfish
Then I find me some academic kind of illustrator
I describe the little dangling utensils on this thing
And tell him to draw it up
So it looks just like a brand new jellyfish

Ike & Mike:
(trying to follow along, they sing some gibberish)

Frank:
"Take that! Take that!"
I fuss an' I cuss and I keep on swimmin'
Till my snorkel puffs up an' turns red
I drool on my shorts
I do some water sports
Then I take the jellyfish back to my house
And stick it in the bed! "Sorta..."

Ike & Mike:
"Whaddya do?"
Stick it again in the bed!

Frank:
"That's right!

Ike & Mike:
Stick it again in the bed!
Stick it again in the bed!
Stick it again in the bed!

(1971:)

Jimmy:
Lonesome cowboy Burt
Speakin' atcha!
Smell my fringe-y shirt
Reekin' atcha!
My cowboy pants
My cowboy dance
My bold advance
On this here waitress!

Mark & Howard:
He's lonesome cowboy Burt. Yee-ha!
Don'tcha get his feelings hurt!

Jimmy:
Come on in this place
An' I'll buy you a taste
You can sit on my face
Where's my waitress?

"Opal, you hot little bitch!"