Giraffes Don’t Have Vocal Chords

[Spoken]
Bug spray goes well with hamburgers
Nobody should be this delicious
Help, my parents won’t let me breath gravy!
My water vapor is evaporating!
I can sing in the key of Pikachu
Put your stapler inside the microwave and receive a thousand vampire snouts
Opinions are like carrots
Eating chicken pox does not make you a leopard
My mom drives a convertible but I drive trash cans
Look at me, I’m invisible!
Why is Noah’s ark in my driveway?
We each owe Mr. Jennifer three goat udders
But we cannot deny the existence of Bart, the 300 pound chicken what lives in your attic
We’ve all got ideas about the quadrilaterals full of fried okra and apathetic rice cakes stuck in between the three atoms of selenium on the boobs of Antarctica
But we can’t deny that your plasma-filled armpits emerged from a two sided polygon and joined Mrs. Butterworth’s rage against an exotic species of African cheese
The uvula fairies have been dancing upon the corn ketchup paradoxes ever since you were a larvae feasting off the blind cave salamander’s udder, part of this complete breakfast
Rats live on no evil star
I use chicken dumplings for sunscreen
Pac-man is naked and so should you
I have to study for an algebra test for my English class
After all, it is our osmosis that gives us the toothpaste we need to replenish our desire to give lollipops to monkeys
Animal crackers are not crackers and don’t contain any animals
So there is no reason for you to boast about how you abducted 42 amoeba claws from a magnolian pilgrim
The tomatoes on my plate are wrestling with my taquitos again!
Stop trying to vacuum Santa