Recruitment Song

[HORSE]
I'd like to bring you up to date
On my adventures as of late
When last I saw you
I was looking for the pieces of the key

You see, I found them all
And then I found my Rider
We went home together
But we got stuck
In the Nowhere Place between the portals

[SPLENDIB]
Congratulations are in order
Horse and Rider reunited

[HORSE, spoken]
Well, uh, okay, so...
So there's actually just a couple more things, uh
Let me finish-

[HORSE]
There inside thе Rift
The Nowhere King was lurking
Waiting to bе freed
And accidentally, I released him
Whoopsie-daisy!

Here's the rub
He's coming now, he's got an army
And we'll need one too
So I returned to Centaurworld
To hopefully recruit you all to fight

[JUDGE JACKET & **MOLETAURS**]
Your problems don't concern the Underground
But your Interruptions here are quite upsetting
**(Moist)**
You're clearly cannot read the room, but if you take a look around
You'll see you and your herd just crashed a moletaur wedding
**(I mean, come on)**

[HORSE, spoken]
Okay, yeah, uh, guys
This is totally a wedding

[WAMMAWINK, spoken]
What?

[HORSE, spoken]
Yeah, I see that now

[WAMMAWINK, spoken]
Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry

[HORSE, spoken]
You got a little dress on and everything

(Moletaur Bride cries)

[HORSE, spoken]
B- but anyway, since, uh
I'm already here, heh...

[HORSE]
I was hoping to recruit you all
To fight the war

[MOLETAUR, spoken]
What war?

[HORSE]
The war that's coming!
There's a horde with swords
The minotaurs will set this place ablaze

[CATAURS, spoken]
No way
Can we bake s'mores?

[HORSE]
No! It's not that kind of fire
It's the kind that kills and harms
I've seen it in my world so many times
We must prepare an army

So
I'd like to invite you all
To join us in the fight
'Cause if you don't
Then you maybe will die
And you maybe will anyway

[GLITTER CATS, spoken]
Me?

[HORSE]
The little one

[SPLENDIB, spoken]
She's talking to you

[HORSE & CATAUR IN CROWD]
No, not you, that one (Huh?)
Maybe both of you
If I'm being perfectly honest (Okay?)

[CHED]
Way to flonkin' go, Horse!

[HORSE, spoken]
I do not need this right now

[CHED]
You're scarin' everyone to death
Big surprise

[WAMMAWINK, spoken]
You brought us back to the beartaur?

[HORSE, spoken]
Look, we can't pick and choose, we need everyone

[ZULIUS, spoken]
I am not going in there

[DURPLETON, spoken]
Me neither

[GLENDALE, spoken]
Oh, no

[CHED, spoken]
I'm not going in there, no

[WAMMAWINK, spoken]
This is your thing
You go in. I'm not going in!

[HORSE, spoken]
He tried to make me part of his collection

[TREE SHAMANS]
The last time you were here
All you did was kick and steal from us
All you did was kick a tree and steal our stuff

[HORSE, spoken]
Okay, you're right. I'm- I'm sorry

[TREE SHAMANS]
How does it feel to kick a tree?
We don't know because we're trees
And we don't kick each other

[HORSE, spoken]
I'm- I'm sorry

[CHED, spoken]
Yeah, I told you we never should've done that

[HORSE, spoken]
What? No, you didn't, you kicked her too!

[TREE SHAMANS]
We don't steal from each other

[CHED, spoken]
I didn't have anything to do with that
That was all Horse

[HORSE, spoken]
I should've kicked you, Ched!

[TREE SHAMANS]
If you're askin' for our help
Then we say no

[HORSE, spoken]
No?

[CENTAURS]
No, no, no, no, no
No, no, no, no, no
No, no, no

[HORSE, spoken]
Okay. Thank you for your time, heh...
I guess