What Kind of a Man Reads Playboy?

(Am I a slut?)

(Wow, this is better than a movie...wow this is better than a movie...)

(Do you think I'm a slut?)

(Wow, this is better than a movie)

A semi-nude love goddess with an hourglass figure approaches and lifts me by an elbow out into a long corridor past several bathrooms which are all being used as personal bidets

With a sensual shove she pushes me into a large room at the end of the hall

Now this is what they call the famous game room

Only men and boy children are allowed to use it and they play boisterously at the many video game machines and foosball tables that fill the room

There are toys galore and Warrant blares on the quadrophonic sound system

Toy helicopters whiz past me as kids run circles around the room shooting each other with plastic Uzis

I try to dodge them and maneuver past a group of wealthy Arab swingers smoking non-filtered Camels

They stare at me from under their bushy eyebrows and I try to break the tension with a joke

No one laughs. No one laughs. No one laughs

(Had enough of that one?)

No one laughs

(Am I a slut?)