The Joker’s Wild

[Intro: Shaggy 2 Dope]
"Welcome to another exciting episode of Delray's number one game show, The Joker's Wild! Shaggy, tell us something about tonight's contestants."
"Hey, mother fuckers! Get ready for the killer show up in this bitch! We got a cop, we got a judge, and we got a redneck, so step the fuck up and play The Joker's Wild!"

[Verse 1: Violent J]
Woohoo! Everybody smile
Guess who's back on your underground dial (Who?)
It's the game show host with the most (Violent J)
And tonight we finna have a little pig roast
Cop copper, it's been a long while
Lace up your boots and come on down the aisle
Mr. Pig-Man packing that steel
But tonight, you ain't shit, now spin the fuckin' wheel
(Ooh) Looks good, nice try
Now let's see just how ya gonna die
Lucky, lucky, he landed on Carpenter Jed
He just pounds nails in your forehead
The pig got lucky that time
But let's take a look who's next down the line
Oh, the 43rd District judge, hey pal
Remember me? You threw me in jail
Take a spin or I'll snap your neck
The clicker's landed, let me check
The Jukey, hey it ain't bad at all
We just cut your face off and slap your skull
Who's next for the games and fun?
Hillbilly Earl, come on down, run
The redneck that sicked his dog on me
Now that's gonna cost you a spin, buddy
Spin around and around it goes
Staple your lips shut, cut off your toes
Then I throw your corpse on top of the pile
Anything goes on the Joker's Wild

[Skit: Shaggy 2 Dope & Violent J]
"Tell me who killed 17 people and later ate their dead bodies?"
"Jeffrey Dahmer?"
"No, the correct answer would be your mother."
*slice* "Aah!"
"Shaggs?"
"Aww, shit, motherfuckers! Get ready for round two in this bitch, so if you want your fuckin' neck bone chopped, step the fuck up and play the Joker's Wild!"

[Verse 2: Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope]
You like big money and prizes, don't ya?
You'd probably kill for a big prize, won't ya?
You little bitch, it's your turn to spin
Free money, now spin again
Oh goody, now unzip your drawers
I'm finna clip this chain on your balls
Raise ya upside down for the bang bada
Now we bust your head like a pinata (Hey!)
The audience loves that shit
Listen to 'em cheer when your forehead splits
Wait! Cut to a break, oh shit, d-damn, uh
We got guts on the camera

[Skit: Legz Diamond & Shaggy 2 Dope]
"The Joker's Wild is brought to you by Faygo!"
"Everybody sing!"
Send your momma straight up to the sto'
Tell that bitch to bring home a Faygo

[Verse 3: Violent J, Shaggy 2 Dope, Legz Diamond]
Welcome back to the Carnival Show
Here's your chance for the big money cash flow
Hit your buzzer, pull your lever
Joker, joker, lemon, (Aww) we sever your head
Pick a door, one, two, or three
It's the same behind every door, me
There's no escape, now gimme that bald head
The crowd can't help, look, they're all dead
At home they just watching your doom
We broadcast from Hell to your living room
I ripped off his nug bone, wicked clown style
Anything goes on the Joker's Wild

[Skit: Shaggy 2 Dope]
"It's time to play hit or miss. Contestant number one, open your mouth. Contestant number two, get ready. Will he hit or miss?
HE HIT! What's next?"
"We got money! We got cash! We got prizes!
We got blood! We got guts!
We got naked dead bitches on the Joker's Wild"

[Verse 4: Violent J, Shaggy 2 Dope, Legz Diamond]
I got my yellow suit and my purple tie
Somebody's gonna die, oh my
It's Mr. Thompson, my next door neighbor
Always bitchin, yellin' from the kitchen
Window, see he died and he went to Hell though
We meet again, I got my own game show
Spin the wheel, 'cause I just can't fuck around
Bonus round!
Oh shit, the end of the game
Bonus round, we goin' out with a bang
You gotta chance for money and prizes
You gotta chance at death, too, hahah (Ooh)
So get ready, I'm coming at ya fast
Your chance for freedom at last
Four questions, so are you ready, Jack?
"Uh, uh, I think so", load the gat

[Skit: Shaggy 2 Dope & Legz Diamond]
"The governor?"
"Eats butt?"
"Yes! The square root of two?"
"Um"
"Correct! Nut sacks don't belong in?"
"Butt cracks?"
"Right! Rich boys eat?"
"Caviar?"
"No! The correct answer is bullets."
*gunshots and laughter*
"Oh geez, ah, well, this is Bink Chipperwink saying so long 'til next week, folks. See ya later, goodbye"

[Outro: Violent J]
"That's it. Go home." (Aww)