SELAH

Never had the confidence written inside me
My ego’s hella small
‘Cause when I think that I’m right, it’s always hella wrong
I fell off of the deep end
My weak skin broke at every puncture
I’m nudging it ‘til the weekend
Knees bent
Hands tied up in praying position
I hate that I miss it
So stressed on commitments
I inhaled addiction
Buttered words in my diction
Wasn’t slick as I thought, as I’ve failed to mention
I pray that God’s giving me time to make up for what seemed
Like eons of reruns of mistakes and weak lines
I try not to equate my weak mind with choices
But reasons to quit now are floating through the mind
That God put upon my shoulders
Should’ve done what mama told him
Should’ve prayed a little more
And should’ve found the time to focus
Should’ve shut my mouth at times where I was tryna say what I couldn’t find
Was dancing on rooftops until I found the edge
I’m running out of time
Yeah
Maybe I’m complicated

But my heart is weak now
I try to write the words I couldn’t speak now
My demons embrace me, I wish they would creep out
Feel like I’m driving wrong on a one-way street now
I barely think now
I’m just a body that’s floating through rebounds
I’m just a mess of a man in these seasons
I’m not okay, I need peace now
Dirt on my jeans now
I wish I knew who I was
I’m in need of

Answers to questions that question answers to questions
My mind stays leaving my body and shit
I have no possession
I’m alone with my thoughts
I’m always dreading the silence
And my depression is goliath
Questioning if I can stand up to giants
I guess I’ll think and be quiet

Maybe I’m complicated

Maybe I’m complicated
But I love you for it
Farewell, summer
When you find yourself and you don’t understand it
Challenging all of these questions
I have nothing left