COOL PERSON

I spent time with my mind in the dirt
Fingers digging lines in the earth
Nights spent crying in my shirt
Tryna understand how I work
And trying to decide if the worth that I’m given
Is determined by something greater than me
Was making my mental weary, depleting my energy
Was stuck in my adolescence, I clenched the pressure in teeth
Whenever I feel the stressing, I check my nose for the bleed
I see the blood on the leaves, the memory never leaves
The details tend to fade, the wrinkles turn to a crease
I feel my happy decrease, so fleeting at times
Fuck what you think of my mind
I miss the days of my youth and numbers grow hard to decipher
Hope I ain’t leaving my prime
Counting my days in the cell
The concrete is cold and painful as well
But shit, it soothes me when my mind consumes me, hating myself
No need for reason, staved it off and took my hate off the shelf
Them summers came and went
Always had to change but never scaled the fence
Had to put my brain where my fingers is
Red handed, need a rinse
Lost child, couldn’t find a road so I paved this shit
I’ve never been happy in fluency
A common contrast ‘tween you and me
Fine line between my rhymes and a eulogy
Defiance and cowardice sound in unison
My hectic thoughts a product of viewing this
These movies that make up a lifetime
The reason I write rhymes
The reason I’m looking back on the past like a timeline
I’ve tried to put this in stone, I’m guessing it’s high time
Been drowned in my thoughts for far too long, it’s high tide
Sink or swimming in these dirty flows
Demons come at every fold
Hella times the pressure rises
I can’t say I never fold
Found this pressure, no control
Whoever can save my soul
Let me take you down this road and tell you how my story goes