My New Gay Best Friend

[Ichabod]
Back in New York
Amidst all the traffic and sound
I was lost
Now suddenly, look what I've found:
A friend
Who knew
Who'd ever construe such a turn around

[Katrina]
My new gay best friend
How continental, cultivated, and sophisticated I will be with
My new gay best friend
Not just ornamental, a relationship reciprocated
I can talk of heartache and heartthrobs
Blow outs and blow jobs
With my new gay best friend

[Ichabod, spoken]
Antonio Vivaldi's Opus number eight the four seasons concerto number three autumn first movement

[Katrina]
My new gay best friend
He's from Manhattan
And tonight he's coming over to my house for dinner
My new gay best friend
I could make a gratin
Bet his New York City friends are prettier and thinner
God he's so fancy
Why am I so antsy?
About my new gay best-

[Ichabod, spoken]
Katrina!

[Katrina, spoken]
Hey! How’d the morning go?

[Ichabod, spoken]
Pretty well, I think. As an introduction to classical music, we talked about Vivaldi and the four seasons. We listened to autumn, of course, since it's, you know

[Katrina, spoken]
Autumn

[Ichabod, spoken]
Right, how was your morning?

[Katrina, spoken]
Oh my God, crazy, always, but look, here’s my address for tonight. Come by around six, okay?

[Ichabod, spoken]
Okay, see you tonight then. Thanks again

[Katrina]
My new gay best friend
Someone who gets me
Maybe we'll go on adventures in the city
Me and my new gay best friend
If my husband lets me
Hope he doesn't get too jealous
My new friend will take me shopping at Macy's
The Will to my Grace
He's my gay new best, my best new, my new gay best
Friend!