Feeling So Numb

Lyrics:
I be feeling so numb
Depression got me locked in a cage
I hate it when I feel this way
So many dreams that I wanna chase
So Why do I live this way
What’s the point of me living now
So much guilt
I don’t think that I can live it down
Climbing up the hill
Another day I’m getting down
I don’t think
That this shit will ever turn around
Conflicting with my brain
I think in two directions
Keep on going
Or just end it with this weapon
It seems like
I am cursed with this blessing
(Blessing)
I am Cursed with this blessing
(Lessons)
I am falling in the river now
I tried to swim
But the river slowly bring me down
Quicker than my middle finger
When I’m in a crowd
I try to fight the average life
But it just bring me down
——
Wether it’s my anxiety
Or wether it’s my depression
I don’t know where I’m gonna go
When I’m losing my self
I confess it
——
Im just chilling in the studio
Man Fuck it it’s the closet
I don’t got shit I need to hide
So sick of myself I could vomit
——
Blowing every fucking dollar
Sick and tired of this muthafuckin life
I wanna grab that muthafuckin blade
Slide it right across my throat
Cause I know
That I won’t get it right
What the fuck is wrong with myself
What the fuck is wrong with my health
I feel like I might have a heart attack
So just leave me in the back
By fucking self