Eclectic Slide

[Intro: Jarv]
Hello, greetings, salutations
It’s Nathan, broadcasting live from the basement
Take this moment, breathe and reflect
For your knees will begin feeling weak in a sec
This is a public service announcement
To make girls’ cervix spurt like a fountain
The earth, it is round and your verse is astoundingly wack
Cut the cable and I’m out

[Verse 1: Jarv]
Can someone get me a Stella
Pass the poison, Myrcella
Putting down these yellow-belly fellas- Old Yeller
Hell or high-watеr hipster pants
I’m in my cellar gripping mics in my blisterеd hands
Shit g’damn, g’day, “I’m the man” ya say
I disagree mon amie, get ya mans away
I got a plan to stay in the barrel getting pitted
Told you not to do it, who knew it, ya gone and did it
Kid, I pump the bass so, punk, pump your brakes
I eat chumps like roast beef on a lunch date
Must stay up to date, son fluctuates
When Jarv get hard he finna funk your face, uh
God dang if I had one wish
I’d be driving a black Mustang like John Wick
That I purchased with rapper cash
That’s a two-in-one, son, I have to laugh- ha

[Chorus: Jarv]
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
I’ve accepted that I’ll never get to get paper stacking
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
Kid, I’m putting on a clinic with this rap shit

[Verrse 2: Jarv]
But still I’m hoping that I blow up
So I’m drinking Coke and Mentos
Eating oriental food and freaking instrumentals
I want candy painted Cadillacs, I wanna be in Caddyshack
“That came out in the 80s” Yeah, time- I wanna travel that
G shit, yeah, gorilla style
Cruella de Vil’s illegitimate child, uh
Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat
And while you’re at it, get daddy a six pack of Switchback
Oh yeah baby I’m finna get loose
Slide left to right, excite with my moves
Who fi gwan test? Yes, them bound to lose
Leaving too many clues as to who got the juice
Dude, I flip shit like meat with a spatula
Look at me reenacting scenes from The Bachelor
Capture the stamina, too fast for cameras
“Daddy got his juice” I flash the gas canister

[Bridge: Jarv]
One day I’m gonna find my niche
I’ll never sell a million records and I’m fine with it
One day I’m gonna hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide
One day I’m gonna find my niche
I’ll never sell a million records and I’m fine with it
One day I’m gonna hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide

[Chorus: Jarv]
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
I’ve accepted that I’ll never get to get paper stacking
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
Kid, I’m putting on a clinic with this rap shit, yo
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
I’ve accepted that I’ll never get to get paper stacking
Fuck making it, I’m making it happen
Kid, I’m putting on a clinic with this rap shit, yo

[Hook: Jarv]
One day I’ma hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide
One day I’ma hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide
One day I’ma hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide
One day I’ma hit my stride
At your record shop, do the eclectic slide

[Outro: Jarv]
I’m sliding out