Drowning

[Verse 1]
Yeah, I wish I can numb this pain
I thought by now I won't complain
I got the cash with half the fame
Lost half my heart and kept the veins
We had our spark and lost our flame
I tried to talk, had none to say
I want the love, you never gave
Was hurting me your only aim
You shot my heart, I bled out hate
'Cause though you left, the trauma stayed
I wish the past, would go away
But I guess gotta live with it
Times changed, I don't feel different
Despite the hurdles in my life I kept my vision alive
I had no one on my side, yet I still did it
I'm missing thе old me, talking pre-deprеssion
Where I felt alive and I had a connection
Now I'm dead inside 'cause I lost my direction
I don't put my wall down for my own protection
And I'm tired of people using me
People lie, what do you believe?
I know people see the truth in me
And I know one day you will see
That being true was a tool for me
I be sticking to myself
I don't need nobody else
Just relief from this trauma that keeps on ruining me
'Cause lately I'm losing sleep
And nobody's getting through to me
It's 'cause it

[Chorus]
Feels like I'm losing sleep
I want my mind at ease
Feels like I'm losing me
I wanna find relief
Feels like I need to breath
I think I'm in too deep, now
I'm drowning in my thoughts
Drowning, by myself
I'm drowning, I need help
I'm drowning, they can't tell
I'm drowning, oh

[Verse 2]
I'm still here and still driven
People see me as a meal ticket
They get nothing, they can deal with it
I guess me and them were built different
I work for whatever I'm given
I been living inside of my room since I was fifteen
Making a bunch a songs hoping somebody gets me
I always felt alone and the feeling is sickening
When your expressing your pain and no one is listening
And life's hard to manage
I feel like I have a disadvantage
Since my childhood left me hella damaged
I don't know love because I never had it
Every relationship I'm in never lasted
Only toxic woman was all I attracted
I continuously fear having attachments
Honestly, it was really hard getting past it
But, it is what it is, you get what you give
I wish I learned quicker, look, I probably did
Just didn't accept it
Inside of my mind is where my demons roam
I try to hide 'cause they won't leave me alone
I overthink all of my mistakes on my own
I don't know where to go, it's 'cause it

[Chorus]
Feels like I'm losing sleep
I want my mind at ease
Feels like I'm losing me
I wanna find relief
Feels like I need to breath
I think I'm in too deep, now
I'm drowning in my thoughts
Drowning, by myself
I'm drowning, I need help
I'm drowning, they can't tell
I'm drowning, oh