Chris (Mixtape Version)

[Verse 1: Ashtin Larold]
I woke up to a bunch of missed calls
Some texts asking if I’d heard the news
My heart dropped, I knew something was off
But why did it have to be about you?
I didn’t wanna believe that it was true
Maybe I could’ve helped you with what you were going through
'Cause I’ve been there myself, but it’s too late now
This is something that you can’t undo
I can only imagine all the pain
The lonely thoughts that were running through your brain
When we all saw sunshine maybe you saw rain
If you’d have just called me, man, I would’ve fucking came
I could’ve told you life gets better
Told you I still consider you a friend
Told you the pain doesn’t last forever
Told you that I didn’t want your life to fucking end
I wish I could’ve told you this in person
Called you up just to say hi
I really didn’t know that you were hurting
Now I just wish I could’ve said goodbye
I’m sorry that you saw no other option
I wish I could’ve been there or done something to stop it
But now I’ll only see you in your coffin
You might be gone but you’ll never be forgotten

[Verse 2: Ashtin Larold]
I remember the first cigarette I ever smoked
And you gave it to me
And the path that I walk on to this day
Well you helped fucking pave it for me
You accepted me for who I really was
You played a crucial part in the person that I’ve become
You taught me how to spit and now I’m here writing this song
But you’ll never even get the chance to hear it cos you’re gone
The worst part is I know how you felt
Suicide was something that I considered myself
Your own head can be your own worst enemy
I just wish I could’ve helped
I wish I could’ve told you I was there
I’m sorry if you ever felt like no one cared
I remember what it’s like feeling hurt, tired and scared
But sometimes life’s not fucking fair
The good die young, the great even younger
We didn’t realize all the weight that you were under
You were a good son, good friend and good brother
I’m happy you no longer have to suffer
I’ll never forget the days I got to spend with you
On everyone’s behalf, you’ll be missed
I’m honored I can say that I was friends with you
I’m sorry, I love you, Chris