Chapter 5: A Story to Be Read on the Reading Machine

Harry-virtuoso-born-musical-mid-Midwest-mellow-
mooing-farm-milky-mooey-farm-;-lullaby-mother-,-
chirping-jigging-Irish-father-.-Spring-red-bursting--
throated-robbins-croaking-frogs-honking-ducks-.--
Music-singing-rails-one-Milwauke-trip-sounds----
Harry-smiling-angel-faced-sound-sensitive-.-----
His-first-violin-lesson-placid-German-local-talent-teacher-Ach-Harry-dont-jiggle-so!-Play-so!-Harry-
fiddling-idolatrous-Mooey-Ma-dishwashing-----scrubbing-floors-.-Harry-fiddling-down-all-harsh--
uncouth-sounds-brothers-made-banging-sordid---
shiny-milk-pails------Harry’s-curls-his-individual
egg-shell-mother-bought-coffee-cup-different-from-
thick-white-uncultured-family-drinking-mugs----
Mooey-Ma’s-egg-shell-curly-Harry-where-art----
thou?----Harrys-white-gloves-first-public-----
performance-church-sociable-.-Mothers-pride----
mothers-throaty-teary-wetty-pride-even-after-falls-
Pearly-priced-mother-drudgery-what-price-knee--
drudgery-knuckles-elbows-red-drudged-.-Her----
Rosary-her-Harry-play-TurkeyintheStraw!-Naw----
t’aint-dignified!-Harry-Give-us-Empty-Bed-Blues!-
Naw-t’aint-classical!-Ta-te-de-de-dum-ta-te-te-
ta-dumb-Harry-Empty-Head-musical-pastels-fussy-
fugues-balmy-a r i e t t a s-tinkling-tarantellas----
formerly-supposed-tarantula-bite-cure-Ta-te-de-de-
dumb-Naw-no-Hot-Mama-Mammy-stuff-no----
ragtime-rhythms-Ach-Harry-don’t-jiggle-so!-----
Neffer-vill-music-come-so!-Harry-conceitedly----
masturbating-music-Harry-sprouting-sixfeetfour--
silk-socked-Harry-.-Mother-bought-socks-----
matching-Mother-made-milky-silvery-fond-----
fondling-curls-Great-gift-parlor-sofa-pillow-----
musician-,-lifting-eyebrows-lifting-egg-shell-little-
fingers-Dresden-daintiness-realold-Dutch-Dresden-
China-dainty-silk-sixfoot-Harry-holding-quivering-
bow-soul-sobs-while-brothers-swilled-sows-busted-
broncos-milked-cows-.-Harry-big-boy-now-taller--
than-three-violin-bows-yet-looking-daily-more-like-
stuffed-Department-Store-Santa-Claus-------
demonstrating-toy-violin-.-Mother-mooing:oH,---
Father!-Harry-must-finish-education-Oberlin----
Musical-Conservatory!-Father-chirping--------
unmusically:-Finish-us-all-off-then!-.-Harassed---
Harrys-soul-sigh-lifting-eyebrows-crowfooting----
smooth-unflurried-wide-blank-forehead-into----
heavenly-angelic-perplexity-wrinkles-.-------
Misunderstood-Harry-Miserable-Ma-swapping---
sighful-misunderstood-miserable-glances-------
knowing-looks-interchanged-.-Hungarian-------
rhapsodic-adolescent-days-Harry-doing-violin----
chores-while-Maw-hustled-red-sweating-panting--
brothers-carrying-pails-around-farm.-Crucial-day--
dawns-.-Harry-a e t a t-eighteen-Father-asks:----
Whatho!-Dull-boy-work-or-play?-Harry-sighs----
c a d e n z a-Maw-sobs-l a r g h e t t o-musical-----
interlude-d u o-Harry-nobly-rises-occasion-plays--
p i z z i c a t o!-Maws-savings-send-him-Milwaukee-
first-faltering-step-up-musicmaster-ladder-----
restaurant-job-sawing-wooden-violin-exchange---
bellyfuls-beef-stew-better-than-being-pearl-diver--
anyway-writes-Maw-only-pot-boiler-great-future--
greater-heights-ahead-Christ-look-what-Kreisler--
went-through-Ysaye-Micha-Ellmann-all-geniuses-.-
Harrys-curly-milky-six-socked-beauty-attracts---
ladies-trembling-horsd’oeuvres-acrobats-go-nuts---
before-cheese-course-send-him-scented-notes-bank-
notes-.-Harry-tinkles-like-street-car-conductor----
through-solos-,-his-arty-eyes-above-,-loose-lipped--
ladies-applaud-eyeing-his-thick-jiggling-brows----
browse-.-Harry-manfully-works-way-East-ladies--
helping-heavily-.-Takes-second-selfmaking-step---
great-career-violin-virtuoso-almost-virtuous-meets-
night-club-proprietoress-earns-drinks-plus-food---
jiggles-jingles-fourteen-hour-day-including------
cocktail-teas-.-Writes-Maw-proud-progress----
-Histrionic-brunette-hairdresser-sobs-into-gin---
sends-Harry-real-violets-after-Masterly-rendition--
Mendelsohns-Spring-Song-.-Harry-writes-Maw:---
Almost-arrived-enclose-two-pressed-violets-please-
note-tear-stains-making-big-NewYork-hit-.-Maw--
unaided-shows-Ladies-Aid-Society-Harrys-letter--
Tells-Father-staytohome-brothers-all-jealous-male-
relatives:-Look-our-Harry!-Pa-corrects-her:-Your--
Harry!-.-German-professor-hears-letter-news----
shakes-hoary-head:-Ach,-maybe-two-V e i l c h e n -
a b e r-Nix-Harry-jiggles-too-much-better-play---
Jewsharp-.-Maw-puts-Harrys-autographed-----
marcelled-Metropolitan-picture-gilt-framed-atop--
dresser-.-Paw-promptly-knocks-picture-off-----
accidentally-purposeful.-Helluva-family-row-----
scene-without-shifters-Maw-tear-melted-center---
stage-mooing-Maw-moaning-heart-picture-picture-
heart-mooey-movie-broken-huddle-over-photo-----
bits-.-Paw-laughs-brutishly-tells-Maw-Aw-dry-up!-
Promises-buy-new-guilty-frame-never-does-.-Maw-
submissively-stifling-sobs-still-snuffles-.-Harry---
continues-playing-way-toward-gilt-framed-fame---
Corner-Broadway-276th.-Street-.-Broadway-finally-
triumphantly-Mawscribbled-postal--card-reads-.--
Maw-still-unaided-shows-Ladies-Lemonade-----
Society-.-Hides-postal-from-Paw-but-lifts----
significant-highbrows-eyebrows-his-direction-just-
like-Harry’s-.-Paw-too-busy-lifting-mortgage----
neither-sees-nor-replies-.Harry’s-getting-along---
short-long-six-dollars-almost-daily-nightly-.-Then--
great-call-comes-world-sea-call-Harry-writes-Maw-
invited-join-great-sea-going-symphony-orchestra--
under-leadership-internationally-famous-Kosher--
Kosarin-little-wages-but-much-first-class-refined--
sea-tea-surroundings-.-Harry-half-seas-over----
groping-through-fogs-tropical-lands-hot-nights---
romantic-just-like-Harry-just-right-serves-Harry- -
right.-Sends-postcard-from-beautiful-Bermuda- - -
showing-city-hall-gorgeous-rainbow-parrot-fish- - -
frieze-mentions-Bermudas-delights-reveals-his- - -
great-musical-success-two-encores-Mendelsohns- -
Spring-Song-three-encores-Pinafore-Medley-two- -
Blue-Danube-one-Merry-Widow.-Saw-flying-fish.-
Maw-reports-great-news-Ladies-Aid-her-cheeks-- -
flushed,-like-Spring-Beauties-What-news-from-- -
Harry?-Surreptitious-proud-postcard-showings-- -
Great!-Just-like-Harry-remember-his-lovely-curls- -
Dear-Harry!-Unforgettable-first-Church-- -- -
performance-his-curls-posivitively-jigging- - -
metronomic-bow-time.-Blessed-boy-way-off- - - - -
Bermuda-fiddling-first-violin-Atlantic-liner-- - - -
renowned-international-music-master-already!- - - -
Herr-Prossor:-Ach-Bermuda-nicht-gut-dot-dam-- - -
Englishe-beer-sour-ass-swill-Harry-jiggles-chust-- -
like-gigolo!-Gigolo-Harry-aboard-ship-feels-- - -
superiority-over-fellow-musicians-piano-player-too-
bloody-English-didn’t-always-keep-Harrys-time.- -
Traps-too-vulgar-wore-loud-ties-thought-lady-- - -
passengers-stuckon-him-Harry-knew-better-they-- -
liked-him-best.-Fourth-member-Kosher-Kosarin’s--
BermudaorBust-International-Orchestra-played-sax-
pinochle-poker-etcetera-had-chronic-catarrh-- - -
smelled-sour-picklish.-But-hadn’t-really-great-- - -
geniuses-crawled-up-stuckup-their-manes-their-- - -
lionized-heads-through-just-such-slime?-Harry-- - -
kept-aloof-like-back-home-his-nose-above-- - -- - -
barnyards-still-Maw’s-clinging-vine-clean-- - - - - -
smelling-buttermilk-boy.-Fellow-musicians-loved--
blondes-Harry-loved-his-Art-his-hollow-eyed-stray-
straining-strained-art-impulses-After-successful- - -
Burmuda-barmaid-season-Harry-could-play-M’s- - - - - -
Spring-Song-flawlessly-without-music-before-him- - - - -
but-continued-turning-sheets-effectively-Harry-- - - - - - -
stood-up-tall-poplar-tree-other-three-sat-down-- - - - - - - -
insignificantly;-Harry-shook-condescending-curls-- - - - -
replying-applause-when-any.-Lunch-time-playing- - - - - -
never-his-best-felt-puckish-slightly-seasick-but-- - - - - - - -
nighttime-always-Triumph-once-knocked-‘em-cold- - - - - -
putting-over-Pinafore-Medley-four-encores-aboard- - - - - -
specially-chartered-deluxe-Elks-Convention-family- - - - - -
plus-trip.-Lunch-failure-never-explained-probably- - - - - - -
artistic-temperament-morning-sickness-wobbly-sea-- - - - - -
legs-standingtoo-near-terribly-food-smelly-- - -- - - - -- - - - -
kitchen-galley-or-sleeping-all-night-alongside-loud-smelling-
Saxophonist.-Above-such-things-Harry-towered-
tremendously-scooting-fameward.-Next-year- - -
Buenos-Aires-run;-hotter-twenty-sea-days- - - - -
down-trip-ten-lazy-B.A.-days-then-twenty-back.-
Marching-madly-around-deck-fiddling.-- - - - - - -
“Horses!-Horses!”-announcing-deck-horse-races- - - - -
miniature-wooden-horse-races-gambling-first-class-- - -
passengers-enjoyed-quite-beneath-Harry’s-- - -
skyward-nose;-accompanying-booming-drum- - - - -
awakening-Rio-de-Janeiro-passengers-all-first-class-
playing-“Cheer!-Cheer!-Gang’s-all- - - - - -
here-whatta-hell-dowe-care?-What-ta-’ell-do-wecare.-Now!-
Ceaselessly-up-down-deserted-dawn-dark-decks-
Tramp-5-A.M.-Payjama-time!-Dodging- - - - - - -
some-shoes-shoes-from-irate-but-firstclass-- - - - -
passengers-bound-B.A.ward.-Always-honorably-- -
dodging-first-class-shoes-first-class-everything-- --
aboard-ship-treated-almost-like-passenger-only-- - -
once-weekly-Kosher-Kosarin’s-International-Pan-- -
American-Pep-Band-cheered-bleak-second-class- -
souls-conducting-low-kitchen-maidy-function-- - -
called-deck-dance;-Harry-hated-such-service-but-- -
gradually-forgot-horrors-thinking-what-pleasure-- -
giving-himself-charitably-cheeringup-lowly-needy-
music-hungry-second-class-souls-dim-half-souls-- -
thinking-steadily-upon-other-six-week-nights-amid-swell-first-class-passengers-pouting-cabaret-- - -
dancers-vacationists-carrying-dollies-doodahs-- - -
tickling-away-doldrums-dreardoms-tantalizingly-- - titillating-A-One-Boy-Harry!-From-Rio-de-Janeiro-
(accent-Rye-oh)-Harry-sent-Maw-colored-card-- - -
showing-Municipal-Theatre-scribbled-across-bold--
hand-writing,-“South-America’s-Paris-Playing-- - -
here-now.”-Truthful-Harry-James-they-were-- - -
playing-South-America’s-Paris-but-hardly-- - -
Municipal-Theatre-time-Maw-made-natural-- - -
mawish-mistake-told-Ladies-Aid-Harry-Opera-- - -
Housing-while-really-playing-back-room-sporty-- -
Praca-Tiradentes-restaurant-where-jovial-varnish-- - salesman-passenger-took-bunch-from-boat-- - -
celebrating-Birthday-varnishing-all-Ryeoh!-One-- -
big-Wow-night-ashore.-“Playing-there-ryeoh-our-
Harry-his-beautiful-building:”-awed-Ladies-Aid-
ladies-intoned-“Harry’ll-adopt-Eyetalian-name-- - -
come-back-lead-Metropolitan-orchestra-little-old-- -
New-York’ll-get-fooled”-they-spoke-toothfortooth-
fine-Eyetalian-eye.-“Shouldn’t-wonder”-Maw-- - -
admitted.-“Ach!-Harry-Cauliflower-Head-playing-- -
near-music-some-blind-pig”-said-Herr-Professor.-
Buenos-Aires-triumph-Harry’s-first-taste-- - -
Champagne-“They-call-me-Pan-America’s-
Ysaye-Maw”;-boat’s-name-“Pan-America”-Harry--
neglected-informing-her.-Trip-back-Harry-played-
roulette-Miramar-Beach-Hotel-Santos-realized-- - -
sinfulness-excused-grounds-great-artists-must-- - - - -experience-everything-know-feel-imbibe-chance-- - -
etc.-Harry-progressing-won-twelve-dollars-- - - - - - -
intended-send-Maw-beautiful-soulful-butterfly- - - - -
tray-singing-like-Blue-Danube-Waltz-but-instead-- - -bought-blondine-passenger-mildly-cursing-parrot-- - - -
because-she-insisted-also-parrot’s-head-same-color- - - -
hers;-she-thanked-him-but-didn’t-meet-him-behind- - -
life-boat-after-midnight-supper-despite-promise.- - - - -
After-two-years-frothing-back-forth-North-South- - - - Atlantic-waves-waving-same-beat-Maw-suggested- - -
visit-home.-Harry-too-busy-replied-rehearsing-- - - - - -
Pirates-Penzance-Medley-all-new-hit-hard-hold- - - - - -
orchestra-up-highest-standards-all-weight-resting- - - - -
his-broad-shoulders-new-pianoplayer-unusually-- - - - - -
dumb-regretfully-must-sacrifice-personal-pleasure-considering-career-“Will-take-you-son-- - - - - - - - -
honeymooning-Maw-round-trip-first-class-Buenos-
Aires-instead-soon’s-musical-progress-warrants.”-
Maw-trustfully-imparted-palpitating-secret-Ladies-
Aid-set-about-nervously-sewing-herself-- - - - - - - - -
bewitching-canary-colored-organdie-- - - - - - - - - - -
surreptitiously-thinking-bygone-days-sewing-- - -
Harry’s-first-little-shirties-before-bearing-greatest----
living-virtuoso-bringing-him-joyously-into-canary- - -
colored-world-all-pink-dewy.-Harry-would-take-her- - -honeymooning-just-herself-her-artist-boy-Moon-Southern-Cross-Among-all-those-music-worshipping-first-class-passengers-mingling.-Maw-raised-higher-eyebrows-toward-uncouth-chirping-jigging-husband-not-her-very-own-creation.-Harry-hardened-into-professional classical player---
ambidextrously-flicking-sweat-drops-from-nose-whilst-playing-Liederstraum
soulfully-his-hot-corner-near-noisy-noisome-- - -- - annoying-kitchen-galley-never-missing-single-note-or-one-drop-sweat.-Harry-learned-lifting-arched-- -
eyebrows-half-inch-higher-whilst-rending-haunting-lurking-mystic-Bohemian-Girl.-Full-passenger-- - -
lists-thrilled-Harry-triumphant-exalted-but-measly-little-passenger-lists-thirty-wobbly-tourists-- - -- - -
dribbling-over-musty-meals-discouraged-artistic-- - endeavor-dispirited-downhearted-downcast-- - -- - -
couldn’t-give-his-best.-Small-cabin-list-small-tips--
put-whole-orchestra-outoftune.-Then-came-- - -- - -
Dorothy-trippingly-fittingly-love-fashioned-merely-nurse-made-chasing-two-pink-little-lucky-- - -- - -
offspring-shrewd-American-merchant-located-Rio-de-Janeiro-but-Dorothy-beautiful-dumb-blonde-- - -
pacing-decks-all-day-picking-her-charges-organs-- -
Teddy-Bears-from-lee-scuppers-dragging-about-- - endlessly-to-autos-trains-getting-ginger-snaps-deck-steward’s-pantry-too-often-wanted-play-violin-her-- admiration-alone-but-orchestra-didn’t-play-- - -- - -children’s-mealtimes-she-ate-kiddies-table-Only-- -
time-Harry-could-concentrate-her-attention-
nights-when-she-hung-shadowy-outskirty-among-- - -
stewards-stewardesses-other-maids-watching-
first-class-dance-Harry-deftly-executed-many-
dreamy-waltzes-Dorothy-dedicated-bobbing-his-
beautiful-virtuoso-locks-directly-her-direction-Dorothy-- - -
finally-found-out-his-true-feeling-True-only-two-
nights-before-arrival-Rio-but-Dorothy-fast-worker-
besides-ginger-snappy-deck-steward-showed-bold-preference-other-ladies-maids-aboard-Dorothy-- - -
finally-met-Harry-top-deck-beside-big-black
smoke-stacks-blacker-shadows-after-midnight-
supper.-Next-morning-both-showed-black-------
smoky-shadows-under-eyes.-Dorothy-met- - - - -
him-both-last-nights-then-Harry-knew-love-put-forth-
new-art-spirit-put-self-soul-into-his-playing.-Also-- - -
developed-business-technique-producing- - - - - - - - - -
more-better-tips-picked-moony-businessmen-gold-- - -
enmeshed-dowagers-big-wattles-bags-under-dead-bright-eyes-picking-daintily-true-born-violinist-- - - - - - - - - -
picking-his-divine-instrument-plus-plucking- - - - - - -
purse-strings.-Harry-became-star-picker-bowed-- - -- - -
profitably-Spring-Song-finales-warmly-thanked-- - dowagers-trip-ends-pressing-five-ten-even-twenty-dollar-bills-into-his-manly-six-foot-four-hand.- - - -
These-tips-Harry-gambled-pyramided-became-- - -
known-well-known-Casino-piker-Rio-Santos-- - -Montevideo-Buenos-Aires.-Harry-luck-love-- - -
roulette-lottery-everything.-Dorothy-won-securely-
sheltered-Rio-nursery-waiting-one-long-month-- - -
then-two-Harry-nights-twenty-days-wait-then-- - -
Harry-home-tripping-again.-Unlike-her-sailor-- - -
musician-having-one-love-one-port-Dorothy-had-- -
sailor-lovers-from-all-ports-but-their-Rio-visits-- - -
seldom-dovetailed-so-her-dovetailing-progressed-- -
without-undue-danger.-Once-after-miraculously-- -
winning-eight-hundred-dollars-roulette-Harry-- - -
decided-stop-ashore-six-months-Dorothy-holiday--
musical-revel-local-cabarets.-But-nervous-Dorothy-poutingly-pointed-his-art-duty-her-new-dress-- - -
needs-hats-shoes-wherewithals-unmentionables.- - - Together-they-spent-one-joyous-afternoon-off-- - -
shopping-Harry-back-aboard-counting-twenty-six-- remaining-dollars-recalling-all-hazily-while-- - -
playing-Auld-Lang-Syne-pushing-away-from-Rio-
remembering-too-his-firm-resolution-buying-Maw-much-awaited-present-beautiful-Blue-Danube-- - - - - - - - - - - --
Butterfly-tray-beautiful-blue-resolution-sadly-- - - - - - - - -
slipped-again.-When-they-laid-Maw-away-- - - - - - - - - - -
generation-later-she-insisted-being-buried-garbed-old- - - -fashioned-canary-colored-dress-she-had-never-worn-but- - -also-directed-town-orchestra-play-- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Mendelsohn’s-Spring-Song-local-violinist-leading-looked- - like-Harry-who-couldn’t-get-back-from-- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
musical-Mediterranean-tour-Ach-said-lowly-- - - - - - - - - - -
mourner-nicht-gut-jiggle-schust-like-Harry-too-fast-jiggles.

(Note: The hyphenated form to suggest movement, continuity of words, word flow, is the only one I can think of. It is inadequate, but the imaginative reader may get the idea of a flow of type in spite of the awkward breaks at the line ends, unavoidable in linotype composition. Punctuation is a problem which can only resolve itself when the words are put in motion. Probably no commas or periods will be needed and any symbol, as /, may be adopted for a paragraph, or spaces of different length may satisfy the reader’s eye in place of punctuation.

The form of the Story To Be Read on A Reading Machine suggests the abbreviated dispatches sent by foreign newspaper correspondents to cut down cable expense, it is not offered as a new literary style, it is merely given as an experiment in writing prose that might be rapidly readable when passing before the intelligent, experienced eye. New forms, styles and condensations will suggest themselves. The twenty-five

most used in English are left out entirely, sometimes to the loss and often to the gain of the text. Written in full present-day stationary reading prose this story would be 35 % longer, which would be ridiculous, it is long enough as it is; given its full quota of “Ofs” “Thes” and “Ands” Harry’s little life story would occupy 35 % more space, which would be hard on the paper-growing forests and utterly unnecessary.

Statisticians have found that in a novel of 80,000 printed words the following twenty-five are used the number of times indicated:

The: 5,848
Of: 3,198
And: 2,624
To: 2,339
A: 1,696
In: 1,693
That: 1,076
It: 973
Is: 970
I: 924
For: 828
Be: 677
Was: 671
As: 626
You: 620
With: 582
He: 584
On: 514
At: 498
Have: 494
By: 480
Not: 471
This: 458
Are: 434
We: 423

29,661

Approximately 30,000 of the words used in a book, 3/8ths, or nearly one-half of its bulk, are repetitions of twenty-five little words one to four letters long, which the active modern mind skips, takes for granted, now that there is more reading and writing going on.