A Couple Of Times

[Verse]
All my bridges burning, like I live in London
And even though I want for nothing, I still want to wish for something
I want to know love, the kind that gets toxic
And is not platonic and leaves me neurotic after even a hug
Leaving me dry-heaving and sweating, wondering
What I've said or what I've done to even deserve this blessing
But I'm deserted, the heat burning like it's a desert
'Cause the world fans the flames and says that you and everyone you know should probably be together
If they're of the opposite gender
Well, that's mainly my family despite the fact, when I tried
I fell flatter than Stanley and got hurt inside
But, if there's one thing I've always done, it's to hide from that
I've become complacent in the statement
That emotion is really baseless and remaining faceless
Would let me always be the romantic plaintiff
But I'm thinking that may not be absolute because I may have taken it too far
If I'm feeling nothing, then all I can ever do is prosecute
And never defend, and if I'm like that
The list of people that I've never loved will continue to extend
And never end and I'd honestly like to stop being listless to just be listless
I'm confined to behind lies
I tried to convince myself of
That everything I'm looking for can be found in self-love
But I can't love me more, and everything still sucks
I want to crave someone's presence, not see any of their flaws
And it's not like I haven't, it's just the obvious cause
Because I was caught up in the moment
And I didn't account for the fact that I was giddy, and it affected the amount of care that I actually felt
The honeymoon phase hit me really hard
For like a week until I realized
I didn't care at all
Because I realized the truth was she didn't care at all

[Outro]
Oh, oh- and this happened twice!
With two- yeah, with two separate people
Yeah