What I’m About To Say

What I'm about to say
May come out of the blue
A sudden darkness that won't disappear
What I'm about to say
May break our world in two
But one that wasn't ever really here

And does it matter in the end
How long we've loved or how we've made it last
It's taken longer to pretend
To hold on to an image of the past

Cause what I'm about to say
I've told you time and time again
Only I just wasn't speaking out
Or you wouldn't understand
How my love had worn away
That's what I was trying to say

What I'm about to say
May twist a dagger in your heart
And shatter all the hopes and dreams you had
What I'm about to say
May leave you badly bruised and scarred
Wondering if live was ever meant to hurt like that

But does it matter in the end
What could have been or what we've lost
We build a fortress out of sand
With borders that nobody should have crossed

Cause what I'm about to say
I've told you time and time again
Only I just wasn't speaking out
Or you wouldn't understand
How my love was torn away
That's what I'd been trying to say

I told myself all wounds could heal
If only given time
But love felt like a poisoned arrow
Stuck inside my mind
I wanted to believe so badly
Trust could be rewon
And God knows that I tried to love you
But the feeling's gone

Now I watch you sleeping, peacefully, unarmed
Lying here beside me, unaware and unalarmed
I pray the night won't go away
For what I'm about to say