What Am I Doing

[Intro]:
Nah dude
I don't think you're understanding how wild this shit is
Alright, just let me explain it you, alright?
*throat clear*
Aight look, yo

[Verse 1:]
Your boy’s coolin’, wasn’t lookin’ for trouble
On the L train, posted up in front of a couple
The dude was takin' a call, so he gets up and shuffles
To try and find some quiet but she rolls her eyes and she chuckles

So I, give her a look like my eye on the Hubble
To feel her out and yeah I’m tryna be subtle
‘Cause I’m not ready to rumble, I just busted my knuckle
Plus her man’s got muscles like he Russell, Westbrook

Her chest look, phenomenal, I’d be up in triple double jeopardy
If he’s comin’ back to see her sitting next to me
He would step to me, pressing me, fuck it, let’s go
I’ma go nuts, and ball out, vasectomy, yo

Ayo, shooters shoot just like a Kennedy theory
Let me get your name so I refresh my memory clearly
Said that’s a nice purse and thermos, Hérmes and Yeti
She’s gettin’ friendly like we know each other already, yeah

[Interlude:]
And so I'm thinking, like
"Yeah, this is going going pretty well
Do I, do I pull the trigger here?
Do I, do I just dip out and leave?"
Alright, here, lemme keep going, lemme keep going

[Verse 2:]
Aye you’re not nervous or shy, I guess you’re used to attention
And your man don’t concern us, he’s a waste of a mention
So fuck that, and she's like “who, that guy?”
It wasn’t really something I was taken aback by

In fact, I, expect it, it’s that time, we exit
No Shaggy, if we got caught on a camera I’d confess it
God damnit, now we catchin’ a ride, she text my phone
To give her number and I went and replied

And so we slide, to her place, 8:04 on the dot
A short blonde, jean shorts, and Dior on the top
And it’s five minutes 'till her clothes are on the hardwood
Then I hear a rumble like a car would, oh fuck

My luck, just so happened that the Wi-fi sent
Her location to her boyfriend up on Find My Friends
Well bye-bye then, ducked up out the window and
I haven’t heard a word from her or my guy since, god damn

[Outro:]
And dude, I'm sitting here thinking like
"Am I the bad guy here?"
Like no, definitely not, right?
Maybe
Probably