The Trench Coat Museum

I'm reclaiming the trench coat
Who from and what for?
'Cause I wear it when I'm headed off to war
Yeah, the longer the cut, the tougher you are
And mine drags along the floor
Through the sweatshop shrapnel
It gets trapped in my car door
And I'm tall next to small people
And I'm not as poor as you were
And I still get positively sick
When all the bellboys call me "sir"
'Cause you never get used to the power
That a proper trench coat brings
The way that it swishes and swings
It sings

Do you know the history of the trench coat?
What it represents and who it's for?
What I want to know is who would want a coat
So close to the floor?
I went to the trench coat museum to see 'em
A thousand different cuts
Like pelts from another dream
Stuffed and bursting at the seams
'Cause I'm fishing for a theme
If it's somewhere in-between
A day's honest graft
And constantly fleeing the crime scene

The trench coat got banned for a bit
Does that conjure up any weird feelings?
Knowing all kinds of twisted minds could find it
A prime coat within which to conceal things
You can't ban a coat, can you?
Can you ban a coat? Nope
They're just running a racket
The only coat that matters now is a floating coat
So get yourself a life jacket
Can you hack it? Can you hack the heat?
Water rising
Look at your feet, man, ah
'Cause whether rented, borrowed, bought, stole
Secondhand or brand new
Mine's water-resistant and heatproof
My trench coat will see me through

And when I'm gone, I want all of my trench coats framed
And my knackered boots and dirty glasses
Tastefully arranged on the plinths in-between
'Cause when they get to the final exhibition
That celebrates my good name
I want you to be on display too
'Cause all that really remains of me is
You

Here we go
Alright? (Yeah)

Here's a song that sounds like fun

I want you to be on display too
'Cause all that really remains of me is
You

I want you to be on display too
'Cause all that really remains of me