The One Indispensable Man

[STUYVESANT, spoken]
I am only a man, like yourself, but with a profound theory of government. Under any government there is one man who handles the cash. The payoff man.

(sung)
Ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha
You're the one indispensable man
In every government
Whatever its intent
There's one obscure official with a manner innocent
His job invisible
Is purchasing good will
With wads of public money taken from the public till
He's the one indispensable man

[TIENHOVEN]
I'm the one indispensable man!

[STUYVESANT]
There's little said about him
But you cannot do without him
For of governmental measures
There's but one omnipotent
It's the measure
Of your treasure
And just where and how it's spent
By the one indispensable man
By the one indispensable man

[TIENHOVEN]
Ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha
I'm the one indispensable man
The governmental pocket
No matter how you stock it
Will never win elections if there's no one to unlock it

[STUYVESANT]
It's really very funny
How governmental money
Transforms an opposition storm to weather calm and sunny
You're the one indispensable man

[TIENHOVEN]
I'm the one indispensable man!

[STUYVESANT]
The guilders spent on Sunday
Return in votes on Monday
And although you lost the argument
With cash your point is proven

[TIENHOVEN]
I've no horns
My foot's not cloven
I am plain Mynheer Tienhoven
And the one indispensable man

[STUVYESANT]
And the one indispensable man

[TIENHOVEN]
Yes, although I'm reprehensible

[STUYVESANT]
Perhaps quite indefensible

[TIENHOVEN]
You'll find me, if you're sensible

[STUYVESANT]
Completely indispensable

[TIENHOVEN]
The one indispensable man

[STUYVESANT & TIENHOVEN]
Yes, the one indispensable man!