The Corona Song

[Verse 1]
I am locked in a self-quarantine
Thanks so much, corona
The economy's the worst we've seen
And now my grandma thinks that she can justify
Hysteria she feels inside
So she takes eight more Ativan every day
I keep telling her, grammy, your body can't handle it, you're eighty-two

[Verse 2]
I guess I'm sort of doing the same
What I mean to say is I'm just trying to tune out my brain
I stay relaxed by watching everything on Hulu
And on Netflix and on TruTV
And Pluto, and Disney+, and Quibbles
Is that one even out yet? What about Peacock? I can't remember them all

[Pre-Chorus]
I am truly terrified
For when I'm no longer pacified, oh
By every streaming service
Will I get what I deserve?
This might make me face myself in a way that I haven't before

[Chorus]
Oh, shit
Oh, shit
Oh, shit
Oh, shit

[Verse 3]
I don't want to tune into my thoughts
Where is my career going? Will I ever be paid to write and direct? I wish my grandpa hadn't died before seeing me succeed
I don't want to tune into my thoughts
And I don't want a front-row seat to my feelings, yikes

[Pre-Chorus]
And I don't want to stream my stream of consciousness
I'd rather turn it off and just turn on AppleTV
Or Amazon Prime or HBO Go, or isn't there another HBO one, too? Jesus Christ

[Chorus]
Oh, shit
Oh, shit
Oh, shit
Oh, shit

[Outro]
You know what, there's always YouTube Red
Forget about facing myself
I can always start watching YouTube Red
Sure, there's not really anything I wanna watch on there, but it beats dealing with myself, yay