The Bad Touch

[Intro]
Ha-Ha! Well now, we call this the act of mating
But there are several other very important differences
Between human beings and animals that you should know about

(I'd appreciate your input)

[Verse 1]
Sweat baby, sweat baby, sex is a Texas drought
Me and you do the kind of stuff that only Prince would sing about
So put your hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts
Yes, I'm Siskel, yes, I'm Ebert and you're getting two thumbs up
You've had enough of two-hand touch, you want it rough, you're out of bounds
I want you smothered, want you covered, like my Waffle House hash browns
Come quicker than FedEx, never reach an apex, just like Coca-Cola stock, you are inclined
To make me rise an hour early, just like Daylight Savings Time

[Chorus]
Do it now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Do it again now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Getting horny now

[Horn Interlude]

[Verse 2]
Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket
Like the lost catacombs of Egypt, only God knows where we stuck it
Hieroglyphics, let me be Pacific: I wanna be down in your South Seas
But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory"
So, if I capsize on your thighs high tide, B-5, you sunk my battleship
Please turn me on, I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip
So show me yours, I'll show you mine, "Tool Time," you'll Lovett just like Lyle
And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files"

[Chorus]
Do it now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Do it again now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Getting horny now

[Horn Interlude]

[Bridge]
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Do it again now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Do it now

[Chorus]
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Do it again now
You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals
So, let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Getting horny now