Download "Stupid Things I Won’t Do"

Stupid Things I Won't Do by William Finn (Ft. Adam Heller)

Release Date
Tue Jan 01 2008
Performed by
William FinnAdam Heller
About

Finn wrote this song for Elaine Stritch to sing as Fanny Cavendish, in his as-of-yet unproduced musical The Royal Family of Broadway, based on the 1930 film of the same name. Fanny is an aging stage actress and the matriarch of a family of performers, inspired by the Barrymores, concerned with her o...

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Stupid Things I Won’t Do Lyrics

[ADAM]
Reading papers when there ain't a review
Is a stupid thing
And I won't do it
When I read I want to read something new
Or why read anything at all
Wars will always happen
There's always strife
But opening a show
Just happens one time in its life
And that's why reading papers when there ain't a review
Is a stupid thing that I won't do

No no no...
You can kill me
You can grill me
You can cuff me on the ear
I still won't do
You can boot me
You can shoot me
But that's not a thing that I will do

Men may laugh
And women may chortle
But there's a reason I'm immortal
And reading rags when they're ain't a review
Is a stupid thing that I won't do

(spoken)
And another thing, while we're on the subject

(sung)
Making movies in Hollywood-
Stupid thing
I won't do it
Bet your booties I'd be god damned good
But that's not a game that I will play
I'm a seasoned actor
I don't skate, I don't dive
The only roles I want
Are roles where I'm performing live in person
Making movies in Hollywood:
Is a stupid thing that I won't do

No, no, you can kill me
You can bill me
You can nail me to the wall
I still won't do it
You can maim me
Defame me
But there are certain things I won't pursue
I've achieved my awesome potential
By focusing on what's essential
And making movies, Hollywood:
Stupid!

Living life like a normal person:
Stupid thing
I won't do it
After five minutes as a normal person
You can lock me in a mental ward
And throw away the key
Though I live with passion and joy and rage
The only time I feel alive is when I'm on the stage
And that is why living life
Like a normal person
Is a stupid thing that I won't do
No, no

I need theater
I love theater
It's the food that I eat
Eight times a week
God bless theater
Life is weirder
Maybe not, but whi;s to say
What can be more prim and officious
Than cleaning floors and washing dishes
Good for them
Who can do those things
But they're not the things that I can do
No, no, no
Good for them
Who can do thise things
But they're not things that I can
Do do do do do do do do do do do do
Those are things that I can't
Never have
Never will
Be able to do

Stupid Things I Won’t Do Q&A

Who wrote Stupid Things I Won’t Do's ?

Stupid Things I Won’t Do was written by William Finn.

When did William Finn release Stupid Things I Won’t Do?

William Finn released Stupid Things I Won’t Do on Tue Jan 01 2008.

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