Spineless

Intentions are pure but fear I’m just like the rest
Hateful, deceitful, lying, regretful, constant second best
No regard for this world, only think about themselves
Now I walk through this hell, once an angel then I fell

Glimpse at the world through the eyes of a nihilist
Everything is worthless, serving no purpose
Confined to my mind, stuck in a cycle so near lifeless
I refuse help, my mouth sealed shut

It crawls beneath my skin, itching to get out
Disdain breeds within, spinelessness again
All the things that I deplore
Live within this mental sprawl
Concerned, deserved with no applause
The curtains close, can’t watch me fall

Further discomfort, another flaw, more mistakes I’ve made
So much regret, it’s all I know, caught in the undertow
Pulsating weight inside my skull
The pressure is building, I want out now
Twitching and flinching, uneasy and shaking
From the inside out I am rapidly breaking

Glimpse at the world through the eyes of a nihilist
Everything is worthless, serving no purpose
Confined to my mind, stuck in a cycle so near lifeless
I refuse help, my mouth sealed shut

Walking paradox, feel out of place
Parts of myself I must erase
Stay the same and nothing’s changed
Old ways here to stay

It crawls beneath my skin, itching to get out
Disdain breeds within, spinelessness again
A worthless pawn, a stepping stone
This nervousness is all I’ve known
Cautious, anxious and all alone
Refuse to be a mindless drone

All the things that I deplore
Live within this mental sprawl
Concerned, deserved with no applause
The curtains close, can’t watch me fall
Can't watch me fall
Sympathy falls into the maw