Skating Rink / Letters

[Part 1 - Skating Rink]

[Verse 1]
We met on that app that Doni put me on to
Phone calls every day, our connection was seeming strong, too
3 months passed, and he said he was down to meet up
I got all excited, told my sister, she's like “bro that’s all you”
We talked locations, he's like “what about the skating rink?”
I ain't been there in ages, “I’m about 4 years too late” I think
I still agreed, I get to see him, so I don't care
Hung the phone up, I blinked and that Friday night was there
My stomach doing backflips while I see my hat is gone
Waiting for Devin to pick me up, and that's just adding on
Thinking “should I tell him?” in the time I'm waiting
I know he ain't gon' trip, I'm just not ready for that conversation
I get the “come out” text and feel pounding in my chest
Find my hat and I'm out the door along with my stress
In comes anxiety fueled by imagination
I’m quiet the whole ride there & pass it off as acting patient
We’re riding down Sublett and all the signs I see are lit
Then my brother asks me “who you linking with?”
My heart drops to my toes and I make up some quick lie about “music friends”
He believes it, like “okay bet, do it then”
Cue the sigh of relief
We pull up and even more weight lies in my feet

[Verse 2]
I hop out the car and my arms lock up
Legs feeling like a Kyrie crossup
Second thoughts creeping in, “what's your shy ass doing out alone
Just to disappoint some boy? You ain’t been out your home
In what, 2 years? And all of a sudden, now you're grown?
Wait, he texted back, now it's on”
He hit me like “just come inside, I'll be waiting for you at the second door”
I walk in, see this cute guy and I’m who he beckons for
My anxiety melts right when I step in his direction
There's booths by the rink, we went & found our little section
He took a Snap of me and captioned it “my boyfriend's cute”
I just looked at him like “I like that”

[Verse 3]
I'm happily receiving his affection
In the middle of him playing with my hair, these 3 girls try to press us
Yelling and storming to our booth for no apparent reason
Why can't they just leave us alone? This shit is barely even
Right when I think the situation's hard to manage
Out of nowhere comes my new boyfriend, going off in Spanish
I'm taken aback cause the whole situation's kinda odd
I found his tirade intimidating, but kinda hot
The 3 girls fall back & we sit down
Later on, I found out his friend got them kicked out
Now here comes the owner, I think “damn, he must've heard”
He says, “I hope those 3 weren't bothering you lovebirds”
And now I'm blushing and smiling like “nah, we're all good”
He apologizes, I told him I understood
I would've just let them punk me, had I been by myself
So I thanked him & his friends, like “y'all were lots of help”
We spent the rest of the night roaming in Wal-Mart
Messing around with flowers & skateboards - wait, that's a small part
He grabbed my face out of nowhere and I froze
We got our first kiss in the aisle that nobody knows
Fast forward, we're on the way back to my place
My head on his shoulder while we're coasting down the highway
I check my phone again - what happened to Friday?
Pulling up, I notice Mom's car ain't in the driveway
This might be the best night of my life
Got one more peck in before I left - wait, it might've been twice
Heard the car pull off right as I closed the front door
The light in my room was still on, I didn't know it was though
Texted my friends, and I left them on read
Cause I passed out soon as my front end hit the bed
What a night

[Part II - Letters]

[Intro]
Often times, those closest to a person can hurt them the most, in some occasions, without us initially noticing. This is, however, not reflective of all human relationships

[Verse 1]
It's been a year, I still can't bring myself to say your name
I just think of how you changed as soon as summer came
Every single thing you put me through just plagues my brain
Seems like you're over it, I wish that I could say the same
I'm probably to blame for everything if someone asks you
I'm probably not shit and an apology is past due
They won't find out about what you did to me, toxicity
Threatening cheating or hurting yourself just to get to me
Snaps of blood all on your sink had my chest killing me
Made me feel imbalanced from your own instability
I noticed over time, this ain't fading
Now I can't even listen to my phone ring without shaking
Flashbacks to the time that AJ rushed
Me home 'cause of snaps where you were bleeding from the ****
You told me it was fake, but the night before said different
I would tell someone, but who they gon' believe?

[Hook - Miles & (Shiloh Dynasty sample)]
(How did you get here? I'm drunk & confused
I tried to be patient with you)
Slow down
Don't fall too fast

[Verse 2]
I can't get out of bed, mom is hitting my line
I can't tell her I don't think I'm gonna make it this time
I just got my spirit broke, I got my innocence bruised
I can't tell anybody that what I got was ******
I mean, how she gon' react? I'm in my room feeling worthless
Sister bringing me breakfast, cause she's the only one heard of
What's happening, but even then, she don't know the half of it
Still not spilling when she's all ears when I have to vent
The more I think, the heavier it weighs down
Lie in bed like this just paralyzed me from the waist down
Nightmares coming heavy, my eyelids don't wanna stay down
This ain't who I met at my old childhood hangout
Didn't know I ain't deserve it, had to learn as such
Fast forward a year later, it doesn't hurt as much
Like, “dry your eyes, baby boy, it's not your fault”
I learned I was the healer all along, but at what cost?