Reflections

[Verse 1]
I was always doing the most
But got nothing for it
Always noticed a hole
It’s about time I explored it
All of this pain, can’t ignore it
All of this change, can’t afford it
I got 10 toes on the pavement
But my mind is in orbit
“Don’t Hit Me Right Now”
That’s what I always said
That was the phrase that made the bed
Of which I lay and pray and vent
Pushing everyone away
But honestly, I wished they stayed instead
So uninvested in my own life
That I ain’t give a shit what day was next
Every day was the same
College was killing my brain
Working was killing my soul
Lizzie was hiding my pain
I need to get a grip on myself
‘cause I been living ashamed
I used to talk a big game
But I backed it up, when’d that change
I was in Missouri, told my momma not to worry
‘Bout me, little did I know we both got demons creeping, stirring
I was all alone, y’all didn’t see me fuckin’ hurting
Yet I’m back at home, it still feel the same, it irks me

[Chorus]
I do everything myself now
I feel like it’s all on me
I’m never asking for help, nah
But maybe that is all I need
I put my heart into everything
All I need back is some love
Though I don’t feel like it all the time
I know that I am enough

[Verse 2]
I said this a self-improvement summer
But I realized if it’s all for you
Then did I at all improve
You said “move on” and I have tried my hardest to
I got good at not calling you, but that don’t stop the thoughts of you
Looking for validation from other people
A toxic trait, it’s fucking lethal
But sadly it’s what we all want
To pull you up from underneath you
I was depressed for awhile
Blessed that the light has finally peeked through
Sure, I’m making these songs for y’all
But I’m the one I need to speak to
Work on you and acknowledge the progress
Cuz this shit’s a process, I swear that you got this
Just try and do not stress, when you’re down, you got friends
And family to pop in to tell you “don’t stop yet”
Thanking every person that has ever helped me cope
None of us say it enough, we in the same boat
Thankful to myself, cuz that’s who has put in the most
Need to focus on myself, change up the approach

[Chorus]
I do everything myself now
I feel like it’s all on me
I’m never asking for help, nah
But maybe that is all I need
I put my heart into everything
All I need back is some love
Though I don’t feel like it all the time
I know that I am enough

[Outro]
I put my heart into everything
All I need back is some love
I put my heart into everything
I know that I am enough